The Blunt Instrument

Fully Persuaded

2011-05-16T15:48:00.000-07:00

My cousin Marcia wrote in her blog, Healing Waters today about being fully persuaded that what He has promised, He is able to perform (based on the scripture found in Romans 4:21). When I read that I thought about what it means to be fully persuaded. Many people profess a deep faith and belief in God, his divinity, his power and his authority. Yet they live lives of sadness, frustration, confusion and lack where he is concerned.

I've written about a double minded spirit earlier this year and I have found that my perception of God has changed in 2011. Reading Iyanla VanZant's book "Peace From Broken Pieces" and looking at and addressing the brokenness in my own life has been a real aha moment for me. I thought I was fully persuaded about who God was in my life only to find that my pain and my issues had colored my faith in God. So many people in my life had promised one thing and presented me with another that my subconscious belief was that God would fail me like so many others. Of course I never said that or had a conscious negative thought in that way, but my actions, driven by my subconscious, constantly told a different story.

I guess in order to be fully persuaded you have to be able to see God with clear eyes that are not clouded with pain and self-judgement. He doesn't change, but we are constantly changing.

Kirstie We Love You But Size 4-6? No Way...

2011-05-10T12:51:00.000-07:00

I have been on every diet known to mankind. The scale has been kind to me and the scale has been the devil incarnate. And wherever I was on my 'weight-loss' journey, I always tried to at least tell myself the truth. But I also know that many times if I did not tell people how much I weighed they would have no idea. My favorite game at the county fair was 'Guess Your Weight' because I would win every time. Today on EW.com they had an article about actress/comedienne Kirstie Alley and her latest fall on Dancing With The Stars (DWTS). The story headline was "Kirstie Alley on latest mishap: 'My blood sugar had dropped.' (But hey, she's down to a size 6!)".

Let me say first that Kirstie doesn't owe me any information about her weight and/or dress size. I got my own to worry about and that is a full time job for me. But when her people put out these ridiculous statements that even Stevie Wonder could see don't add up, it demeans her real accomplishments which deserve much praise. First of all, she is a very talented actress and a comedienne who has now added dancer to her tool set and she is doing it well. At age 60! And looking great while doing it! You can stop right there for the applause.

The rest of it is meaningless theatre and I'm pretty sure that that particular storyline is being pumped up by the producers. I wish they would stop it. The facts are that she is there because she wants to be and she is doing something that is good for her health and her self-esteem. Could they please stop treating the viewing audience like we are more likely to believe their press releases than our lying eyes? My pastor used to say, “I may have been born AT night but it wasn’t LAST night”.

This kind of thing bugs me because I am in the process of losing weight, and I would be panicked if people were asking me all the time what size I am now. I’m learning to enjoy exercise and I do it because I know it is good for me. My exercise of choice is walking. I normally walk up and down Colorado Blvd. and Eagle Rock Blvd. area because I can combine the fresh air with people watching, a latte or a fruit smoothie. I am not ready for rough terrains yet (no steep inclines) but I like a lot of variety to my walks. Where do you like to walk in Eagle Rock? I mean areas that are well populated and considered safe for women by themselves. I know Pasadena has the Rose Bowl Walkers, (http://www.meetup.com/Rose-Bowl-Walkers/), and I see a lot of people out together when I go to Griffith Park, but is there a similar kind of group in Eagle Rock? Oh, I should also add that my pace is still slow, an 18 minute mile. Who is with me?

Let The Weak Say I Am Strong....

2011-04-26T12:05:00.000-07:00

UPDATE:
Well I got through my first transfusion today and hopefully only two more weeks to go. Next step will be to finish my teaching courses so I can inspire the next generation of storytellers. And as soon as I get the strength to write again I'm going to finish my books. But now... I am definitely going to nap.

Sometimes the Holy Spirit uses this blog to give me a spiritual "heads up" on what is needed for a future battle. My last blog was about getting rid of fear and I was also preparing for a 7 day mini- cleanse as per the Martha's Vineyard 21 lbs in 21 Days Diet. I've learned to stay on track with what my inner voice is telling me so I completed the 7 day cleanse and lost an additional 6 lbs. My weight loss for 2011 is now holding at 30 lbs. Thank you God.

Finally I can say that I "see" a change in my appearance and clothes are fitting better. Outfits that were shamefully retired can now come back into the main rotation and that is a relief. I've been consistent with my exercise, taking my ASEA and wearing my Bodymedia Fit armband to catalogue my results.

My next battle is a health challenge that I thought I dealt with before but it has come back for another round. I'm a little angered by it because it steals my physical energy and that is what I need to exercise and prepare the life-giving healthy food that keeps me going. Today, just the act of typing makes me tired. I don't really like to put medical details on a blog because the internet is forever and your health situation is subject to change. A position of weakness today can be a position of strength tomorrow. So even as I sit here tired I recognize that this is just another chapter in my life and it has come to PASS.

But today I thank God for what he has already done in my physical body and for the complete healing that my body is undergoing. I am also going to continue to educate myself on what I can do to live an long and healthy and active life. One thing I know for sure, my body seems to respond very positively to the vegan diet. I'm not sure I want to give up fish and eggs, but chicken and beef are becoming less attractive to me. When we know better we do better. I'm still learning and I can't wait to learn more...

Peace and blessings,

dede

Spring Cleaning and Getting Rid of Fear

2011-04-17T13:32:00.000-07:00

If you are a reader of this blog then you know that I did a detox diet in January and embraced some lifestyle changes to get a better stronger physical body. Well one of the tenets of the Martha's Vineyard Detox Diet is that after you complete the 21 day cleanse, you do it again at each change of season for a 7 day period. So you do 7 days in the Spring, Summer, Fall and then do the 21 day cleanse again at the 1 year point. So this week starting Monday April 18, 2011, my family will be doing it again for 7 days.

I'm looking forward to the cleanse this time, not because I like drinking vegetable soups, but because I'm looking forward to giving my body a tune up. Since the January cleanse I have kept off 24 lbs. and added a 3 mile walk to my daily life. I walk at least 18 miles a week and even though my eating habits sometimes miss the mark, the exercise seems to be helping me to maintain the weight lost at the beginning of the year.

I've noticed that the disconnect between mind, emotions and body still exists. I have not kept a food journal (even though that is a proven way to help weight loss and correct bad eating habits). So I have some areas of my life where I clearly know better but I willfully refuse to do better. It is not a conscious motivational error - if you asked me, I would tell you I am committed to change and a healthy lifestyle and most of the actions are there but there are still things that show a subconscious disconnect. Have you seen this in your life as well? You say you are ready for change but some of your actions are in clear rebellion to that change?

I can't speak for you, but in my life that disconnect is the manifestation of fear in my life. I've spent my life afraid of many things. I did not start out that way but life has a way of beating things into you if you live a life of rebellion and for many years I did. So when it comes to weight loss and optimal health, the subconscious fear is that I won't be able to handle how others perceive and interact with the new healthy me. It is safe being big, jolly funny Dede, but a fit, strong Dede is a new scary world. Again, I can't speak for you, I can only shine the light on me. I wasn't ready to own up to the fear before, but I am ready to do it now.

I got an email from Amazon.com recommending things I should buy and one of them was the new Kirk Franklin CD, "Hello Fear". I listened to the music and found it articulated a desire in my heart during this season. I am ready to let go of lifelong fears. I really want to discover some "what ifs" in life. What if I lived each day like God had my back and I could not fail? What if I treated my body like a temple and trusted that it would respond and reward me with good health? What if every time the scale registered a couple of lbs gained I did not treat it as a personal failure? What if I embraced each new technological advance as a way to make work easier not harder?

My parents had differing responses to fear. My father is not a fearful man. He is ill now, but when he was well, he welcomed change and adventure and he tried to make me laugh at my fears of insects (he'd kill a bug that had me screaming and then chase me with it, laughing at my fear until I was laughing too). He'd try to teach me to swim by throwing me into the water, laughing at my tears, (that one never worked Daddy). My mom is afraid of so many things, the pain of change, new people, places. Life has also given her the pain of loss and many reasons to fear and I think it must have been so amazing for her to meet my father with his adventurous spirit and mostly positive outlook. One thing we all learned growing up was that God had sent us the Holy Spirit so we would not have to live a life of fear. But even that knowledge doesn't make you immune to the destruction of fear. You must make a conscious decision to reject fear and its power over your life.

So during this season of spring cleaning I breathe in a new spirit of change and sweep fear out of my life. I'm going to go get ready for tomorrow's 7 day cleanse. If you want to do it with me, I have an outline of the plan and the grocery list in the January 2011 blog entries. And next week when I celebrate Resurrection Sunday I look forward to my own resurrection.
Good-bye Fear.

Peace and blessings,

dede

Where Did the Time Go?

2011-03-02T18:28:00.000-08:00

It is hard to believe that it is already March 2, 2011. What a difference a day makes. I started the year with a mantra of change and change has indeed come. I know better so I am doing better. And I am honest enough to jack myself up when I am not being true to myself.

I have lost 21 lbs since January 5, 2011. I don't see a change in my body but I do realize that it has changed. I'm fitting into smaller clothes that were too tight 60 days ago. I can tell that I am not comfortable with this change because I am still not writing down my food logs (even though I know that is one of the best ways to make lifestyle changes and locate and isolate bad habits.) I am starting to like my daily walks now. Walking allows me the chance to clear my mind and meditate on the blessings of the day. It is such a blessing just to be able to walk and to have a safe, beautiful place to go and exercise every day. I'm able to do a 19 min mile now and I do at least three miles a day.

I think it is safe to say that using the Body Media Fit Armband and taking the ASEA redox signaling molecules every day have made a difference. The armband lets me know when I've exercised enough and even tracks my sleep. The redox signaling molecules seem to help me breathe through my workouts and recover from the muscle fatigue after the workout. I have not talked to my doctors about these changes but I will do that next month when I have my physical.

I hope that you see by now that you can make your own change if you want to and it does not have to take years to make it happen. I want to thank the family and friends that sent the encouraging words these past two months. I'm going to keep on going with this journey to see what the end will be. I'll keep you posted as I pass future milestones but I won't bore you with the day to day minutiae of the change process. Hard work pays off. I get the equation now. It is hard to believe that 2 1/2 months ago I heard someone talk about the Martha's Vineyard Detox Diet at a Gospel Concert and heard an inner voice say "You need to check that out". I listened and I feel so much healthier as a result.

My prayer for you in the month of March is that you listen to the still small voice that articulates the desires of your heart. Don't wait until you feel better, sometimes change hurts. Keep me in your prayers, I'll be doing the 5K Glendale Downtown Dash on Sunday March 14, 2011 to benefit Glendale Adventist Hospital's Stroke Services Center. This will be my first race since I had to stop training for the Half-Marathon in 2009. I'm slowly making my way back. To God Be the Glory.

Peace and blessings,

dede

Peace From Broken Pieces

2011-02-24T14:03:00.000-08:00

I finished the book, Peace From Broken Pieces by Iyanla Vanzant this past weekend. Even now, I struggle to put words together to describe the experience of reading it. It is a visceral, gut-wrenching, brutally honest glimpse into a life, analyzed to the DNA level of conscious and subconscious. And if you have suffered any brokenness in your life you will see yourself in some places. Reading the book was so hard for me that some nights I had to just put it down like hot coal, knowing that if I kept reading I might see some things in myself that I was not ready to see.

Some of my church going friends felt hesitant about reading the book because of Ms. Vanzant's spiritual beliefs as a Yoruba priestess (like it might be contagious once exposed). I assure you that my belief system is intact, mainly because it is tried and tested. But the wisdom and authority from which she writes about brokenness and the road back from it has changed me and helped me on my own journey to wholeness.

The most positive thing I believe I have gained from it is that I look at myself through a more honest lens. I hate lies and if you are a liar you cannot be a close friend of mine because I think liars are dangerous. But I now recognize that there are truths about me that still remain hidden to me and personal lies that I tell myself and the Holy Spirit loves me enough that he will not allow them to be revealed until I am ready to deal with the knowledge. Some knowledge and revelation arrived at too soon can crush you before it heals you.

I think of myself as a mentally healthy, happy, whole, saved, sanctified and filled with the Holy Spirit woman but I also know that in a family where few are obese or even overweight you do not get to be over 300 lbs (without even recognizing the weight being gained) without some kind of dysfunction or brokenness at the core. I had the blood tests to check the thyroid or insulin resistance or any number of things that could cause weight gain and all levels were normal. Trust me, I hate writing those words. But really, even if I didn't write them down, was there anyone in my circle of family and friends who DIDN'T notice I was fat? I'm pretty sure they did. I know I did. And I felt embarrassed, ashamed, and tho I didn't admit it to myself, I hated myself. So I punished myself and those who dared to talk to me about the issue by eating even more of my pain. Alone, late at night. Where no one could see.

I can write that now, knowing that I'm not in that position anymore. I am not completely healed but I am in the process of healing. Some of that healing shows on the outside (I've lost a lot of weight and maintained most of it for almost 6 years now.) Relationships that were destroyed by my low self-image are coming back. I appreciate and love my family so much more now because I see them as people who love me. Some in ways that I do not like. Some in a manner that needs adjustment from time to time. But people will only treat me at the level that I tolerate and allow. I need to change so that those around me can also change.

There are some battles that I refuse to fight anymore. Weight is one of them and I will continue to write about my journey because I'm not going to visit these places again. I'm going to learn the lesson and move on. I used to think my worth was tied to my gifts. That when the Bible said in Proverbs 18:16 (New King James Version)
"A man’s gift makes room for him, and brings him before great men." , that people wanted to be with me and work with me only because of my gifts and talents. I felt that if I no longer had those gifts then the people around me would disappear too. Some of that is true. I do have friends that have left the building because the hook up isn't there or the cash isn't flowing as readily and I can't do that free job because I have to pay to upgrade my equipment. And I've had church folk stop calling because after years of volunteering to use my gift "for the Lord", I've said "Could you maybe give a sista' a love offering from time to time?" No more. I choose to walk away from abuse, even if it comes from a church or a ministry. Those who love me, value me and recognize my self-worth includes my gifting but is not defined by it, well, they are still here. And so am I. Every day I'm walking toward my own peace from broken pieces. I'm choosing to walk toward wholeness and away from dysfunction. What about you?

Peace and blessings,

dede

Learn Not To Give Up

2011-02-21T00:01:00.000-08:00

"We must learn not to give up when requirements are not met or when commitments are broken. To do so is a refusal to allow mistakes to be corrected and a demonstration of an unwillingness to forgive yourself or anyone else who needs forgiveness"
Iyanla Vanzant, Peace From Broken Pieces

I read those words on Sunday afternoon and had another light bulb moment of revelation about myself. I really punish myself when I fail to meet goals that I have set for myself and many times I have told myself, "Well, I guess this is just not my time" or "this is not for me", after a public and embarrassing setback. What is worse is that I retreat from my goal because I don't want others to see and comment on my failure. So fear of laughter and ridicule would be enough to get me to back down from a dream in the past.

Last Sunday I took a day off from my daily walks and I am happy to report that I did not let that day off signal the end of my dream about daily exercise. It did not feel good mentally this week. First the weather forecasters were saying all week it was going to rain and I had to push to just go out and walk anyway. I only got caught in the rain one time and most days the sun stayed out until long after I had finished my walk. So I did not listen to the weather forecast and I got out and walked anyway. Last week I walked a total of 17 miles during the week and my husband and I walked 3 miles on Saturday and another 3 miles on Sunday. I proved to myself that you can feel like crap and still be good to yourself. Next week I will measure inches again to see of things are looking better. But I feel better, not when I'm walking, that still feels like work but I feel good when I finish and the recovery time for my muscles is so quick, now that I am taking the ASEA every day.

You would think, man, Dede must be so proud of herself, what a big change she has made since January 4! Yet all I can feel is, man, I've been doing this for almost a month and a half and I should look and feel better by now - right?

I can't make this journey based on feelings. My attitude about myself needs some real growth and change. I been angry and disappointed with myself for a long time and I punished myself by not taking care of my mind, body, and spirit. And as long as I was reaching out and working to benefit others, I convinced myself that I was okay.

If there is anyone else out there who is like me I have a word for you. Your family and friends would feel better if you took care of yourself instead of others for a change. Your body is a temple that is set up to house a divine spirit within. When you make your body into a temple where the divine can live and flourish, the Holy Spirit inside you will be free and able to speak to you about really helping and blessing others. But you will be able to do it in wholeness and not from a position of need. And the first thing that the Holy Spirit will talk to you about is you.

The world needs people who are healthy; mentally, emotionally and spiritually. A problem would never show up in the life of a believer without the ability for the believer to activate the solution. But you will never be able to meditate and see the solution if your feet hurt, your back aches and you haven't slept in days.

I am glad to say that six out of seven days last week I met all of my goals. I did not chart all of my meals but I kept a daily running total in my head. I will strive to meet all my goals every day but I am going to enjoy the lessons along the way. On a practical note, The Body Media Fit armband and Digital Wrist Display have been a big part of keeping me on track. Having a machine on your wrist that beeps when you meet your daily targets is a great way to learn to be accountable.

My prayer for my family and friends is that they be in health, with a clarity of purpose and focus. If you are happy with the way you look and feel today, I am very happy for you and pray for your continued blessings. But if there is anything that you feel dissatisfied with and feel like a change is needed - then start today. That feeling is the size of a mustard seed today but inside that feeling that 'change is needed' is the power to make it happen. Two months ago I had a feeling that it was time for a change because my body felt like it was dying. It started with listening to that voice but the process now works independent from feelings or thoughts in my head. Mistakes are being corrected and I am forgiving myself for new hurts every day. I'm learning not to give up,

Peace and blessings,

dede

How Bad Do You Want It?

2011-02-17T16:34:00.000-08:00

That is a question that I ask myself often because I know that there can be a disconnect between what I say and what I do. So far in 2011, my money and my mouth have been in alignment for the most part. I've been thinking as I put food into my body and I've been exercising. I can even say that I'm liking it more too. It does not hurt as much now, (especially since I've gone back to my daily dose of ASEA. Also, my body is once again firing on all cylinders and since I've gone back to the daily ASEA regiment my weight is starting to come off again for the first time this month. I continue to wear my BodyMedia Armband and meet my calorie intake, burn and sleep targets.

Now, it's not to say that there is a big change in what I look like, though I can say I feel different. But I'm starting to get these crazy cravings out of the blue, like on Tuesday there was a good gourmet food truck on my street and I wanted to order a large order of Parmesan Truffle French Fries. Now don't get me wrong, the fries are really good and I could have split the order with my husband to mitigate the damage but it would not have been a good food choice for someone who wanted to regain her health, strength and her life. And I had to fight the desire for more than a minute which is just crazy.

Deep down in the depth of my belly, I knew what the real problem was. I was afraid of actually succeeding in this lifestyle goal. Because when the weight and the physical challenges go, many excuses that I have had about being stalled at this point in my journey will go too. No longer will I be able to say, "They don't see me, they just see my weight", or "I can't do this task because I don't have the stamina to complete it".

There are many questions I will have to come to terms with on this journey. The fact is that all my excuses are simply words that I use to take the pressure off myself to produce what God has put inside me. There are no real reasons here, simply escape valves that give me the release I crave to justify my non-productivity.

So as I deal with that fact that there will be days where my integrity will be challenged, I also have to recognize that I am not the first person to go through this type of challenge. I remember a story in the Bible where Jesus was talking to Simon Peter just before the last supper. He was explaining to him that even though he could not believe it, Peter would in fact deny ever knowing Jesus very soon.
In Luke 22:31-32 (The Message Bible):

Jesus said, "Simon, stay on your toes. Satan has tried his best to separate all of you from me, like chaff from wheat. Simon, I've prayed for you in particular that you not give in or give out. When you have come through the time of testing, turn to your companions and give them a fresh start."

When we think of Peter, we think of the character that was the rock that the modern day church was built on, but notice at this time, Jesus did not call him Peter, he called him Simon. I believe that Peter was still dealing with his own personal lies and his double minded nature where he could love Jesus one minute and deny him the next. To a normal rational person, those two behaviors would not go together. How can you love someone one minute and deny them the next? Or how can you exercise and feed your body good food one minute and eat garbage and stop exercising the next?

Even great people can deal with double minded behavior and make mistakes and I will make many more before I die. But I am encouraged by the fact that Jesus told Simon Peter, "When you have come through the time of testing... and not, If you come through. The act of breathing every day means we will be tested. Victory comes when we recognize negative behaviors and squash them and kill them every time they rear their ugly head. Just because I have a thought does not mean I have to act on it. So I promise you, as I come through this season I will tell you about every challenge and every victory.

How bad do I want it? Really bad. I'm tired of living a life of excuses I really want to live my best life. When I die, I want to die empty. How about you? What is keeping you from your best life? Let's squash it and kill it now...

Peace and Blessings,

dede

Defying Gravity

2011-02-15T10:58:00.000-08:00

According to the Gravity Definition Page , Gravity is one of the universal forces of nature. It is an attractive force between all matter, and is very weak as compared to the other forces of nature. Isaac Newton was the first scientist to define gravity mathematically when he formulated his law of universal gravitation. One of the applications of this law is the concept of ‘escape velocity’, which is the velocity an object needs to achieve to escape the gravitational pull of another object (like the Earth).

I was thinking about this in the morning as I reflected on the week that was. I walked a total of 15 miles for the week and I felt good about that accomplishment. I was tired on Sunday so I did not do any exercise that day but took a day off. On Monday I started again doing what I said I was going to do.

It was interesting to me that there was a dialogue in my mind that said that because I did not walk on Sunday that the daily exercise experiment was over and I was a failure. Daily means every day right? And because of that, on the next day I had to pull against my flesh to go to the park and do the walk that I was growing accustomed to doing. There was an attractive force trying to propel me to stay put and not exercise, like I had done the day before.

I suppose that if I want to achieve success and walk toward purpose in my life then I must live a lifestyle of defying gravity. I am naturally pulled toward the easy and pleasurable things in life and I like to run from hard, difficult or painful things. It is so easy to say, "It's not my problem", and to check out when a task places a demand on my talent, time or integrity. It is funny what we will do for a paycheck every two weeks and what we will not do for family and friends. Or what we will not do to save our own lives.

So I will declare again that exercise is a part of my lifestyle, speaking to my subconscious mind and spirit. Get used to it body, this is just something that we do. And taking a day off is just that - a day off. What I love the most about this journey is that now that I have settled into daily life, there are no dramatic highs or lows. I have not lost any additional weight nor have I gained any. The scale fluctuates and regulates. There is no obvious reward or cookie that is given out because of my lifestyle changes. I do believe that this will happen over time, but this is not a daily or even a weekly fight. This is just what change looks like. And by doing this every day I am ramping up to my own escape velocity where my body can break free from the pull and the force of remaining the same and I will move on to my next level.
I am going on some erands and then I will go for my walk. Defying gravity...

Peace and Blessings,

dede

Doing Right When It Feels Wrong

2011-02-09T11:09:00.000-08:00

I wish I could say I've got it all cranked up and operating on all four cylinders when it comes to life. One would like to imagine that by now, we've learned a few things about how the world operates. But I make mistakes all the time and I find that the good things I do, I do them because I know they are good, not because it feels good when I do them.

I've learned to do things that cause me to feel afraid and to stay away from things that make me feel confused. Sometimes the things I am most afraid of are the things that will get me to a better place. God has not given me a spirit of fear so when I see fear arrive, I'm sure it is coming from a negative place. It doesn't feel good to do things when you are afraid but experience has shown me that it is the best thing for me.

When others tell me something is good for me and it doesn't "sound right" to my internal spirit and I feel confused, I know to take a step back and to challenge the idea being presented. God is not the author of confusion, so when it comes into my life, I know it comes from a negative place. Some call it women's intuition or a sixth sense but we usually get a sense that something is not right before we dive in. I now just trust that inner voice and keep moving on.

So nine days into the month of February, I've been keeping my promise to myself and going on walks in the park every day. When I start my walk now I feel good that I am keeping a promise to myself. It is an act of love to take care of myself and I am used to performing acts of love for others and not for myself. I've come to realize that this is another of those double-minded issues or a personal lie that I've told myself. I'd tell people, 'you have to love yourself before you can love others' fully believing that I was living my life this way but then I'd treat my own body carelessly and avoid doctor's appointments until things were obviously out of control.

Self-sabotage is a symptom of a double-minded person and in order to heal it and move on you need to first recognize that it is operating in your life. Changing the lies we tell ourselves is the hardest thing to do and unless you are able to call out that behavior in yourself you can't do it alone. Until my sister Alex called my attention to the behavior, I denied that I was living this life.

Things I now know two months into 2011:

1. Remember that Product called ASEA that I started taking in January? Well after 30 days I saw a real improvement in my cardio-respiratory functions. Going up hills was still challenging but I did not get short of breath and my heart rate recovered quickly. Also my muscle soreness after exercise was much less. I stopped taking it after 30 days and within 1 week I felt more labored and stressed as I exercised. My husband noticed that I had less energy and my joints also started "giving out" on me for the first time. I called the company yesterday and asked them to send me a new order right away. I'm going to have to find things to cut back on so I can pay for adding this product to my daily supplements. So I can't speak about what it does for athletes but for a non-athlete like me? It means the difference between exercising without hurting the body and exercising to the point of injury and distress. Just one woman's personal anecdote, he or she who has an ear, let him/her hear... I don't sell the stuff and I can't even say it tastes great, it tastes okay. But my body definitely responds to it. I'll report back again after month two...

2. The scale is not my friend. Sometimes it goes up and sometimes it goes down. If I'm going to get into a tailspin every time I give my all working out and I get no love from the scale, then I'm going to quit this thing by March 1. The truth is the pair of pants I am wearing today I could not fit into two months ago. Change is going on whether my scale reflects it or not. So I'll just keep holding on and keep on moving.

That is it for now. It is time for my walk in the park. I've been listening to Marvin Sapp's song "Don't Count Me Out". I love to listen to it when doing right feels wrong. Take a listen and I hope it blesses you too. (If you don't see the embeded video then go to The Blunt Instrument and listen there.)

Peace and Blessings,

dede

Lyrics:

Left alone but never forgotten
Misunderstood but my future is just starting
God is molding me and making me
He's building me and shaping me
A king is being formed right in front of your eyes
So don't count me out

[Chorus:]

When you don't see what He sees
You can't tell but His glory is resting on me
I'm His choice
I'm after his heart
The unveiling is starting now
So don't count me out
[Repeat in Unison]

I'm no longer the same no more (So don't count me out)
There has been a change in me (So dona't count me out)
For there are enemies that I must defeat
It's my time
It's my time
Don't count me out
Don't count me out

[Vamp:]
There's a king in me (don't count me out)
Goliaths' to defeat (don't count me out)
Visions to decree (don't count me out)
It's my destiny (don't count me out)
[x3]

[Solo:]
There's a king in me
Goliaths' to defeat
Visions to decree
It's my destiny
[x2]

Don't count me out

My Money and My Mouth

2011-02-03T12:01:00.000-08:00

Life will constantly provide you with opportunities to test your integrity and belief systems. I've learned to guard my words and to think before speaking because if I say it, nine times out of ten I will get an opportunity to prove that I meant it.

This morning, after writing about integrity and truth vs. facts, I went on my bathroom scale and it recorded that I weighed 2 1/2 lbs. more than I did the day before. This was the day after having a particularly trying workout in the park, meeting all my exercise, calorie burn goals for the week and denying myself extra goodies when others were indulging.

My immediate response was anger and resentment. Why does this journey have to be such a battle? Can't I just have a period of getting the reward for the work done? Can't there be some measure of consistency with the weight loss? I took a deep breath. I realized that I was looking at the facts and not the truth. The fact was that the scale recorded my weight on that morning and at that time. The truth was that my body is in a continual process of healing and building muscle back and decreasing the size of fat cells and as long as I do not quit, the scale will also reflect that truth.

The spirit of self sabotage would like me to get depressed and to stop so that I would reinforce the lie that "This is how my body is, I can only lose so much weight and then I can go no further." Another of my lies of self sabotage is "If I do take the weight off, I will just gain it back within the next five years because my body is just comfortable as a big girl".

The hard thing about the lies you tell yourself is that they live hardwired in your subconscious and you think you are ready for change and next level thinking but you find yourself acting out the lie, even while you tell yourself you are committed to truth. You say all the right things during the day but you crave all the wrong things when you are alone with your thoughts. You become double minded and in a battle between the conscious and the subconscious, the subconscious will always win if you are not even aware that you are in a fight.

So today, I have to take a deep breath, remind myself that this is a long journey and keep on moving. and I will keep away from the scale for at least a week. In order to clean out the lies in my subconscious I have to fill it with new information and do it consistently until the new thoughts replace the old lies that I used to live by.

Today I confronted just one of my personal lies but I have many more to confront as the days go by. I am not going to live a life that is less than the best that God has for me. Not any more. When I discover the truth I am going to shout it out and hope that it helps someone else. What lies do you tell yourself? Do you self sabotage?

James 1:7-8 (GOD’S WORD Translation)

A person who has doubts shouldn’t expect to receive anything from the Lord. A person who has doubts is thinking about two different things at the same time and can’t make up his mind about anything.

Truth vs. Facts

2011-02-02T18:14:00.000-08:00

I like to remind myself about the difference between the truth and the facts so I don't get it twisted in my own life. The truth is I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are God's creative works; and that my soul knoweth right well. The fact is that some days I feel so clumsy and fat - I am not where I need to be to fulfill God's purpose in me but I am on my way.

The truth is that I have family and friends who love me and care about me. Anytime I need help it is just a phone call away. The fact is that some days I feel so alone that I question why I am still breathing. Both realities can live inside the same body.

The truth is that people can witness the same events (or grow up in the same house) and still come away from the experience with different interpretations of what actually occurred. The fact is that your personal interpretation of those events will ultimately shape your life and determine your success or failure.

The truth is that people who love you can hurt you and cut you deeply. The fact is that the pain comes from the wound with no regard as to the motive of the individual inflicting the pain. So whether they tried to help you or hurt you, the pain is still the same.

The truth is that God is not the author of confusion, but of peace. The fact is that whenever people or events come into my life and all I can feel is confused about why they are there, I know that the people and/or the event did not come from God.

Life can be very challenging when we do not know the difference between the truth and the facts. Facts are subject to change but truth is consistent and unchanging. Always hang on to the truth and don't be swayed by facts.

Do you have a truth that you know and live by? Let's discuss it in the comments...

Integrity

2011-02-01T16:15:00.000-08:00

I love the word integrity. The quality or condition of being whole or undivided; completeness. The state of being "all one". Having integrity means that you do what you say you are going to do and what you say and do lines up with what you believe. It means that you do not compromise yourself when it gets tight and uncomfortable.

I want my life to represent integrity. I want my belief system to be reflected in all areas of my life, including my physical being. So I will no longer say that I dislike exercise. Exercise is something I do because I am unwilling to compromise my integrity. So if I believe that my body should be a reflection of my Creator, (and I do believe that), then it should be apparent when you see me, talk to me and watch my actions. In 2011 I am seeking a body, soul and spirit that embrace good health. A being that is ALL ONE. Sometimes change hurts, but change is good.

So I will test my consistency during the month of February. I would like to walk at least 2 miles every day. Why don't you join me in doing one thing to change your patterns and change your life? Another thing I am doing is adding vegan choices into my menu for the family. One item I am trying this week is gardein. What is it?
gardein™ is a wholesome range of tasty plant-based foods with a meaty texture. it’s made from soy, wheat and pea proteins, vegetables and ancient grains (quinoa, amaranth, millet and kamut®). gardein™ is easy to digest and free of cholesterol, trans and saturated fats. the majority of gardein™ foods are a good source of fiber and low fat too. gardein™ is also animal and dairy free.

Go to the website and see all of the tasty choices and try one for just one night of the week, like a meatless Monday. You might even fool the die hard meat-eaters in your family into loving new vegan choices in their diet.

Peace and Blessings,

dede

The Martha's Vineyard Detox Diet Day 21 - Victory!

2011-01-28T10:32:00.000-08:00

Just a short note to say that yesterday was Day 21 and the MVD diet has now been completed. On Monday I will post about my new lifestyle changes. I feel better than I did three weeks ago and I have dropped 15 1/2 lbs during the cleanse. I still dislike doing exercise but I am willing to continue to do it because I am getting ready for a 5K walk on March 13, 2011. My previous time for this 5K was 55 minutes and I'd like to do better this year. Right now I am still pretty slow compared to 2 years ago so this is a good transitional exercise goal for me as I try to do better in 2011. Thank you to all who sent a kind word and prayed for me, I appreciated it and many times needed it to get through.

Peace and Blessings,

dede

Please note that I am not a doctor and this record of my detox cleanse is not an endorsement of any detox diet or product. This is something that I believe is right for me and the results will tell the tale. My goal here is only to report my experience.

The Martha's Vineyard Detox Diet Day 11 - 17

2011-01-23T14:42:00.000-08:00

Wow, I can't believe it but, it is true. I am coming down the home stretch. Four more days to go on this detox cleanse diet. I feel much better than when I first started. My strength and stamina are coming back after being ill most of November - December. My husband is already planning what he will eat when he completes the fast but there is a definite way to end the fast as well as how to begin one. That porterhouse steak he is dreaming about will have to wait.

I'm in no hurry to eat meat. But when I do eat meat I'm no longer going to just buy the cheapest cuts. More than the Master Cleanse, this detox has made me cognizant that what we eat matters. It will affect how we age and how we live in the present. Maya Angelou says that when we know better we do better. May that be one of my mantras from today onward. My two mile walk in the park today was not very fast, I did a 22 minute mile. And I watched families barbecue and play in the park and I appreciated the mountains that surrounded us and I thanked God for the beauty around us.

I don't like exercise. I'm hoping that when I lose more weight that I will feel differently about it. The BodyMedia Fit Armband is a great tool because it reminds me how much more I need to do and as the day goes by I can make adjustments. I like knowing that I have done enough each day to put me in a future weight loss mode.
So far during the cleanse I have lost almost 14 lbs. I have not done anything strenuous, I've just made sure I walked twice a day. This has been a time of healing not working out.

I'll do a wrap up on day 21 and then move on. The Martha's Vineyard Detox Diet requires that you do the cleanse (for a period of 7 days), three more times in the year. It is suggested that you do it at the change of seasons. So I will do this again after my birthday in May. Anyone else want to join me?

Peace and Blessings,

dede

Please note that I am not a doctor and this record of my detox cleanse is not an endorsement of any detox diet or product. This is something that I believe is right for me and the results will tell the tale. My goal here is only to report my experience.

The Martha's Vineyard Detox Diet Day 7-10

2011-01-15T13:04:00.000-08:00

Yesterday my husband and I went out to Griffith Park and did a 2 mile walk with our dog. Well we were walking, he was sitting in his new stroller and was pushed along the route. He is old (15 years) and can't walk far any more. This way he can still come out with me when I exercise.

Well, week 1 has been completed. How does it feel? I feel more energetic now so I am exercising more. I had a come to Jesus moment with The BodyMedia FIT Armband and Display. I realized that I am wearing a tool which tells me how many calories that I take in and burn and it tells me if I have done enough to stay on track, why would I stop short of the daily goals? I was using it to record what I had done, instead of making the adjustments when I did not do enough. On day 7 I corrected my course and made the change. Now the day is not over until all the goals are met.

I believe this is only possible because of the ASEA that I've been taking for the past 11 days. Before I started taking it, I was getting winded very easily when I walked uphill and when I worked out, my muscles took a long time to stop aching (I am overweight and no athlete.) But in these past days I've found my endurance has really increased and I can tough it out thru a long workout, even while on this cleanse. I can also breathe easier when I exercise and not get as winded.

My husband commented today about the increase in stamina that he has seen in me in the last two weeks. As a non-athlete I can say that I am seeing the benefit of the cleanse and the ASEA.

Also my broths and soups continue to be tasty and filling. This liquid detox diet has meant that we have been living a vegan lifestyle for the past 9 days now. I don't miss meat, (because this has a set beginning and end). And I know that I will have more meatless days during the week (with more soups too).

Peace and Blessings,

dede

Please note that I am not a doctor and this record of my detox cleanse is not an endorsement of any detox diet or product. This is something that I believe is right for me and the results will tell the tale. My goal here is only to report my experience.

Martha's Vineyard Detox Diet Day 5 & 6

2011-01-12T19:38:00.000-08:00

The days are becoming more routine now. As I said before, eating fruits and vegetables every day means that I am not starved. I do feel shaky if I do not have my meals at the regular intervals. If you do try this cleanse, do not miss any meals.

The author of the book, 21 LBS in 21 Days is also on Twitter so yesterday I asked Dr. Rhoni a quick question about agave nectar and whether it is suitable for the cleanse. She responded quickly and said yes, it is fine to use it in your iced tea or hot tea as long as it is the organic kind. I had thought so and I don't like stevia, even though it is another all natural sugar made from a plant. To me, it has an aftertaste like saccharine does and I don't like it.

I did not do much exercise in the first four days due to the early healing crisis and lack of energy so I made sure I did my one mile walk with my husband on Tuesday and I did a 2 mile walk on Wednesday. I will be watching to see how and if the ASEA helps me recover from the exercise. I can say that I had more stamina today than I have had since I became ill in November. It is good to feel stronger even though I am nowhere near where I was last summer. This too shall pass I believe. I plan to get on a scale on Saturday (which will be Day 8) and see where I am with energy, and possible weight loss.

I am also tracking my calorie intake, burn, sleep duration and efficiency with the BodyMedia® Fit Armband and Activity Display. This is the armband that is used on the show, The Biggest Loser to help the people on the ranch track their progress. This is another layer of accountability for me and another step to making changes that I can sustain for life.

Finally, I can say that, yes, being on a cleanse or fast does require discipline and does not feel good all the time. There are lots of food ads on billboards, newspapers, buses, and on the internet and TV. Healthy choices sometimes mean more expensive choices and steps to a better life can be taken one step at a time. I am going to keep my eyes open for bargains and deals that exist to help people who want to add better choices to their life.

Peace and Blessings,

dede

Please note that I am not a doctor and this record of my detox cleanse is not an endorsement of any detox diet or product. This is something that I believe is right for me and the results will tell the tale. My goal here is only to report my experience.

The Martha's Vineyard Detox Diet Day 4

2011-01-10T22:59:00.000-08:00

A much better day today but a very hectic one. I was out running errands most of the day and it was a good test for me on time management while cleansing. I made a few of my food items the day before so I wasn't caught without my drinks, soups and teas while running around. It feels good to be home and winding down with a cup of hot tea and a glass of filtered water with a slice of lemon. No headaches today but I drank much more water and stayed hydrated, I think that would be a key to remember if you decide to do the cleanse. Have an 8 oz. glass of water every two hours and you will be fine. I also noticed that it was much easier drinking my ASEA today, but I can't say it tasted great yet, but definitely better going down.

I decided today to get rid of time-waster's in my life, including decreasing my non-business social media presence. So if you don't see me online as much, all is well but shedding toxins makes you so much more mentally alert and it allows you to place new demands on yourself.

The last two years were tough and included a period where I really lost my sense of self. If you've reached a decision point in your life where you have to figure out where you are going next, I think a period of fasting or cleansing can be beneficial. I'm only just a few days in so we shall see what shall be revealed over time.

Peace and Blessings,

dede

Please note that I am not a doctor and this record of my detox cleanse is not an endorsement of any detox diet or product. This is something that I believe is right for me and the results will tell the tale. My goal here is only to report my experience.

Martha's Vineyard Diet Day 3 - Repentance

2011-01-09T20:39:00.000-08:00

Day 3 started with me having a headache again, but not quite as bad as the day before. Every single joint in my body ached however and I was only able to walk stiffly like an arthritic old woman. I felt bad but my husband generously brought my morning filtered water, Burdock Tea and Mixed Berry smoothie to my bed and I pitifully drank them all there. It was pretty obvious that my body was releasing a lot of toxins and I was having my first "healing crisis". If you want more info about that please read the book - I want you to get the right information in its purest form and not my interpretation of what the experts said. Remember, I'm not a doctor, just a woman trying to do better since she now knows better.

After listening to a great Sunday service at my church, (online, because I was not moving well), I started preparing the vegetable broth for lunch and the pureed soup for dinner. It was Sunday so I wanted them both to be special so I started with my regular Mirepoix, (a combination of chopped carrots, celery and onions used to add flavor and aroma to stocks, sauces, soups and other foods.) It is supposed to be about 50% onion and 25% each carrots and celery. I let that lightly caramelize in 2 tablespoons of EVOO and I added 3 cloves of minced garlic and 1 diced green apple. Finally I added 1 diced turnip and 1 diced butternut squash to the mixture with 2 sliced serrano peppers (with seeds included because I like it hot). Then I added a 1 inch piece of peeled ginger root, green basil, thyme, curry powder and a cinnamon stick and 4 cups of organic vegetable stock. I let the broth simmer for 1 hour and then separated the broth and the softened vegetables. The broth we drank at lunch and the pureed veggies were the evening's soup dish. I also drank much more water today and adjusted my ASEA to 2 oz. morning and afternoon, (instead of morning and night). I also had an enema in the evening, no details needed, but if you want to know why, read the book, :-).

My joints felt better in the afternoon and I went for a 1/2 mile walk. It was up and down a grade so going down was easier than going up. I was winded so I only did the 1/2 mile and did the other half later. It is suggested to only do a mile a day while on the detox diet.

After listening to the day's sermon at church, I felt a need to repent. My belief is that all humans are made of body, soul, and spirit and I was not considering the deity inside me when I was making all those food decisions that had a negative impact on my body. If I really wanted to live a life of purpose, why would I eat foods that would kill me before I had time to complete my assigned task? I was living a life of confusion and God is not the author of confusion. I guess I had to clear my mind so I could pay attention to the fact that I needed to change, (not for 21 days), but for good. I'm hoping that during these next 3 weeks that I will get an idea of what that permanent change needs to be. I deserve a better life than the one I am living and the world deserves a better Dede than the one I am giving them. I'm going to continue with my reading assignment and call it a night. Day 3 is finished and I call it good.

Finally, I must say that drinking this combination of dense fruit smoothies, broths, pureed vegetable soups with at least 5 servings of vegetables, and 6 glasses of filtered water, it is impossible to be hungry on this detox. The fruits and vegetables I am eating are nourishing and cleaning my body without a starvation diet so the weight that comes off from this will stay off if I eat with more thought in the future. And that is the plan...

Peace and Blessings,

dede

Please note that I am not a doctor and this record of my detox cleanse is not an endorsement of any detox diet or product. This is something that I believe is right for me and the results will tell the tale. My goal here is only to report my experience.

The Martha's Vineyard Detox Diet Day 2

2011-01-08T17:38:00.000-08:00

I woke up this morning feeling like a train hit me, my head was pounding and I needed some help. I asked my husband for acetaminophen tablets and lay down. He brought me a glass of filtered water, some Burdock Root tea and a Apple Berry smoothie (which can I say was delicious). I felt better in about an hour and the rest of the day went by smoothly. I was better able to plan and prepare and kept to the schedule so that every 1-2 hours we were drinking some liquid, whether it was filtered water, hot tea, a green smoothie or a vegetable broth. For dinner we had a pureed soup made with broccoli, spinach, zucchini, carrots, white onion, basil, garlic,thyme, and cumin. David added a dollop of plain low fat Greek yogurt to his. I added a teaspoon of homemade pepper sauce to mine, (I love my hot foods)!

We went shopping at Whole Foods for more produce and water and while there I had a shot of wheat-grass juice at their juice bar. When I first drank wheat-grass juice I thought it tasted horrible but today's shot tasted like sweet green peas. The aftertaste was very 'grassy', however, I am determined to do this the proper way, and the great tasting food I used to love gave me the body I currently inhabit. I am sick and tired of being sick and tired so I will learn to love wheat-grass and a vegetarian lifestyle if my body tells me that is what it likes to maintain a healthy weight and clean organs.

All in all, a better day. I drank my ASEA and took my other supplements at the proper times. The ASEA still tastes (and smells) almost like chlorinated water and is still unpleasant. My cousin told me that when your body is toxic the ASEA will taste bad but when you become clean it will taste much better. I can't wait for that day, :-).

I am finally reading the book, "Peace from Broken Pieces" by Iyanla VanZant. It is nice to have quiet time to meditate and to read. I am reading this book slowly and savoring the prose. I recognize that people who do battle weight have to do self inventory sometimes to see what we are really eating. I am enjoying this part of the journey too.

Peace and Blessings,

dede

Please note that I am not a doctor and this record of my detox cleanse is not an endorsement of any detox diet or product. This is something that I believe is right for me and the results will tell the tale. My goal here is only to report my experience.

The Martha's Vineyard Detox Day 1

2011-01-07T14:10:00.000-08:00

Thank God for the day of beginnings! It is intimidating to start something that lasts 21 days. Last night I was thinking, "Am I really ready for this? 21 days is a long time. My last fast was only 10 days. Suppose I fail while writing about this and everyone will know I wasn't able to do it?" But I got up this morning with a feeling of, "This is something that you need to do in order to get to your next. Dr. Charles Phillips (my former Pastor and a great motivational speaker) once said during a lesson, "If you wonder why God hasn't spoken to you about your next assignment, then go back and see if you completed the last assignment that you believed he gave to you". I've never forgotten that and I am careful about what I say I will do because integrity means doing what you say you will do all the time. So sometimes when everyone else is volunteering, I will just be silent so I have time to assess whether this is a 'God' thing or a 'good' thing. Not every good thing is good for me.

Sooo... here I am. Day 1 has been fine. My teas today were Burdock Root Tea and Dandelion Leaf Tea. My fruit smoothie consisted of carrot, blueberry, blackberry and raspberry juice. My vegetable broth was made from mexican zucchini, garlic, carrot, italian parsley, tomato, and cabbage. After removing the liquid I pureed the rest with some added cumin, basil, rosemary, curry powder and red pepper flakes and a little almond milk. This thick creamy soup will be tonight's dinner and I'll end the day with more water and some relaxing teas and a green smoothie for an evening snack. You can add a scoop of Protein powder, (mine has 20g of protein per scoop) to the two smoothies. And of course I also took my ASEA supplement - I do 2 oz. morning and evening and I have to say, I do not like the taste. If I had to swallow more than 2 oz. at a time my gag reflex would kick in. Energy wise, I feel fine and I'm going to do a one mile walk for the fresh air.

Peace and Blessings,

dede

Please note that I am not a doctor and this record of my detox cleanse is not an endorsement of any detox diet or product. This is something that I believe is right for me and the results will tell the tale. My goal here was to report my experience because many of my family and friends have said to me, "I could NEVER fast, I need to get my meals EVERY day". And I totally understand where they are coming from, I LOVE to cook and I do LOVE food. I can say that when I have fasted before I found that there is a clarity of thought and a spiritual connection that comes that you cannot get without the fasting experience. Starting the year with a time of meditation, prayer and fasting seems like a good idea to me. What about you? Have you ever fasted before?

Preparing For the Detox Diet

2011-01-05T15:34:00.000-08:00

Two days and counting until I start the Martha's Vineyard Detox Diet. All the Thanksgiving and Christmas eating has made me feel sluggish, and moving is feeling more labored. I'm looking forward to this cleanse and I've come to the point where I can happily let go of some foods that I've been holding on to. Good bye Lay's Potato Chips, I'm ready to let you go.

Prepared my shopping list today for the cleanse. My intake will consist of fruit and vegetable juices and blended soups and vegetable broths. I'm glad that I have an extensive knowledge of spices and herbs for cooking so that there will be lots of flavor with the nutrition.

I will also be adding some supplements, Aloe Vera Gel tablets, 24 Hour Inner Cleanse by Garden Greens and my usual vitamins. The Inner Cleanse consists of a daytime formula of herbs and an evening formula of fiber to help keep you clean. And of course I will be having 2 oz. of Asea in the morning and 2 oz. in the evening to help combat the negative side effects of detoxing and to promote cellular healing.

I have not seen any shopping lists online so I had to create my own. We will be drinking a lot of fruit and veggie drinks and teas but I'm hoping that since I will be buying no meat, dairy or processed food that our grocery expenses should remain consistent. Please note that I am not a Doctor and before you do a cleanse or a fast you should seek your doctor's advice. I'm doing what is right for my house, you have to do what is right for yours. My shopping list was as follows:

Fruits

Cranberries,
Raspberries,
7 - Lemons
10 - Limes
6 ea. - Grapefruit
1 bag – Oranges
Other Berries (in season)

Vegetables
1 - Pumpkin /Squash
4 - Sweet potatoes
4 - Potatoes
1 Bag Carrots
2 Bags - Mixed Greens - Collard, Kale, Mustard
1 Bag - Romaine lettuce –
Beet Leaves, Beets
Cabbage,
Tomatoes
Cucumbers,
Spinach,
Onions,
Asparagus,
Broccoli,
Green Beans
Cauliflower
Zucchini,
Celery,
Black Beans, Dried

Teas, Herbs and Spices
Rice Vinegar
Asian Chili Sauce
Teas – Barberry Root Bark, Oregon Grape Root, Beet Leaf, Dandelion Leaf and Root, Red Clover, Milk Thistle
1 - Ginger root
1 - Cinnamon Sticks,
1 pk. - Clove, Whole
Turmeric Powder
Oregano, Basil, Italian Parsley, Rosemary
Nutmeg, Whole
Vanilla Extract
VEGESPLASH Greens Drink Mix
4 - Vegetable stock 32 oz.
4 – Distilled Water Jug

This is what I needed because I had other herbs, spices and supplements in the house. For a complete list of what is proper, please read the book. Tomorrow I will clean out my cupboards and wash and wipe the cupboards and fridge so there will be no odors of food that is "off my list".

Please come on this journey with me and leave your comments here and not via email or Facebook, those of you who receive this in that form. This will be the spot I go to when I feel like giving up and this will be the spot where I will record my results and post pics and videos. Get ready, get ready, get ready!

Peace and Blessings,

Dede

The End of One Year, The Start Of A New Year

2010-12-31T12:27:00.000-08:00

Wow... December 31, 2010. I made it, while many who thought they would be here today, did not. So first, let me say "Thank You God." I am very thankful that I have one more day to figure out my place on the planet and why I am here.

2010 is not a year I would like to repeat so I am changing my behavior from Day 1 because doing the same things and expecting different results is by definition, insanity. I am preparing for a January Detox and Cleanse, I will be following the Martha's Vineyard Detox , if anyone wants to join me. I will be starting Friday January 7th because my husband wants to join me and he has some commitments next week that would make cleansing difficult.

You may remember that I did that Master Cleanse in 2010 and I enjoyed doing that cleanse but I felt and wrote after doing it that I did not feel that it was a complete cleanse for the liver and kidney as well as the digestive system. After doing my research, I wanted to do this one because a) it should provide me with a complete detox and cleanse; and b) the weight I lose will have a more long-term benefit as I come off the fast and eat 'normally' again. Finally, my expectation is that it will help me to permanently reset what my normal is as I will follow up with a 7 Day Cleanse every 4 months in 2011. You can do this program to just detox and cleanse if you don't have any weight to lose but you want to live with more energy and zest. Just read the book and learn how.

I am also adding a new item to my daily routine called ASEA. It's not a juice, not a vitamin, not an antioxidant. ASEA is redox signaling molecules in a bottle. I'm not going to say too much about it now, I'll wait until I have tried it. Adding any supplement or vitamin to a daily routine is an added expense at a time where finances and jobs are uncertain. And for me to add to my own bills is a step of faith and a fleece that signals I want change. Maya Angelou says that when we know better we do better. I want to always be in a posture of learning and being teachable.

So tonight I'm going to record my stats and take a picture. (I won't post them until the end of the Detox for our celebration day). Please come on this journey with me and leave your comments here and not via email or Facebook, those of you who receive this in that form. This will be the spot I go to when I feel like giving up and this will be the spot where I will record my results and post pics and videos.
By responding on the blog page you will be helping me save my life and teach a new generation on what to avoid. I have a great-nephew and niece now (and I believe more will come). I want to leave them generational blessings and not curses.

Happy New Year! Please come on this journey with me and let me know what you are doing to change for the better. No resolutions, just faith filled actions. Start by writing it down, encourage me as I encourage you, :-).
Peace and blessings,

dede

After The Master Cleanse - We Tally The Results

2010-10-11T16:17:00.000-07:00

I'm winding down my first day after finishing the master cleanse. I went on the scale this morning and I'm down 11 lbs., a nice result. I forgot to measure my inches when I started so I don't know how many inches I lost. A pair of skinny jeans which did not zip up, slid on easily this morning so something did happen on that front.

I was able to have prayer time and alone time where I could look at the truths about who I am. I feel more present and able to appreciate the day. There are some friends I need to reach out to because being disconnected caused me to shut out some who didn't deserve it.

One thing you have to watch after completing a fast is the feeling of being afraid to eat again. Sometimes you look at that weight loss and you say, "hmmm, maybe I should keep going?"

If you want to continue to fast because you feel there are more toxins to get rid of or perhaps you do have a weight target in mind, then certainly continue until you have completed your goal. Where weight loss is concerned, when you start to eat normally again, if you were out of control before, that same behavior will put those lbs right back on and quicker than they came off.

But if you use a cleanse period as a way to make a lifestyle change or a period of attitude adjustment, then you can keep those lbs off and more. I don't crave fried foods anymore so I will limit my exposure to them, sorry french fries, you are gone.

Today after my meal I went on a two mile walk. It signaled to my body that eating time was over and gave me a clear break from grazing. When I get hungry again, I will eat and go for a walk after the end of the meal. I'll let you know in a couple of weeks how that works. Change Is Good.
Peace and blessings...

Master Cleanse 2010 - Day Ten Victory Is Mine

2010-10-10T21:53:00.000-07:00

First off - Thank the Lord, I'm done. I've learned that I still possess discipline, (even though I don't always exercise it) and that I have the integrity to finish what I start - even if it gets hard. I needed that victory so I thank God for it.

I also thank him for every word of encouragement that I received along the way, my family and most of my friends live far from me but you all showed up here on the blog and through Facebook and emails to encourage me, I guess I'm not alone out here in California.

I'm going to continue with my CLEAN detox and figure out the next step. If I could end the year a few pounds lighter that would be a blessing too. I'll post some pics after the detox is over.

Things I've noticed after the fast?

I don't have the ravenous feelings of hunger that I had before. I hope that translates into eating smaller portions when I do eat.
I don't have the cravings for fried foods I had before.
I want to be more aware of what I eat and the effect it will have on me and my productivity.
Drinking water is vital for life and health.
I will never be anorexic - I'm looking forward to eating again.
And finally, I need to walk every day. Period. When I feel like it and when I don't. For my metabolism, if I do not make exercise a part of every day, I am susceptible to gaining weight. I'm probably not the only one. Right now, walking is my exercise of choice and I am looking forward to make it lifestyle. And it starts today.

Here's to new beginnings. Who wants to do a cleanse or fast with me to start the new year? Peace and Blessings...

Master Cleanse 2010 - Day Eight and Nine

2010-10-09T21:50:00.000-07:00

Wow, Friday and Saturday just flew by and tomorrow Sunday will be my last day. Physically, my body has settled into the fast and I could go for another four days and do and complete a two week fast instead of ten days. But psychologically, I think I'm ready to end things tomorrow night and to move on to another detox (which includes food) to end out my second week. I'm going to do the detoxification plan recommended by Dr. Alejandro Junger. He is not a fan of the Master Cleanse because he says that it does not support the cleansing of the liver. He believes that you can detox easily and effectively while you continue to eat as long as you are cutting out the foods and other substances that interfere with the detoxification process. Make sure you check with your doctor before you start any detox. Also be sure to drink A LOT of water.

This menu plan for a seven-day elimination diet comes from the GOOP.COM website that I mentioned in the last blog. The posting includes instructions, menus and recipes for juices, smoothies and meals that will continue the detox process. I think it will be a good way to ease back in to eating solid foods again without stomach upset.

Dr. Junger's book about his cleanse comes out in paperback on December 28, 2010. It is called, CLEAN and it is another source for those of you seeking to do and cleanse, make a clean break from old habits and embrace a new way of living. I'm on my way to optimal health. I plan to explore other things too and increase in knowledge. We have such power as human beings and anything that we focus on and pay a lot of attention to will show increase in our lives.

Tomorrow will be my last blog about the Master Cleanse fast and I won't be posting every day after that. But it will represent only the beginning of my journey to optimal health. And everything that I try and vet that works, I will share with you.

Peace and Blessings...

Master Cleanse 2010 - Day Seven, The Home Stretch

2010-10-08T13:05:00.000-07:00

Day 7 - wow, it is certainly going by quickly! It is funny how you get in a zone after Day 4 and the mechanics of doing the cleanse get easier. It still is an exercise in discipline for me, make no mistake about it. Anyone who has had an addiction knows that after the physical cravings go, you have to deal with the mental cravings. And unlike other addictions, we do have to eat. Every day. So after this break I have some decisions to make about what I'm going to do now.

Living in California I find that there are many people who are trying to live an organically clean lifestyle, people who are conscious about everything they put into and on their body for optimum health. To be honest, it is hard to wade through the information and to come up with what is right for you. I am blessed to live in an area where organic food is plentiful and reasonably priced most of the year. So as I learn to do better I can afford to do so as well. My energy levels have increased so I can also get back to my daily exercise to keep my limbs moving and active. An interesting website is goop.com which has lots of lifestyle information. It was started by Gwyneth Paltrow and the info is presented in a easy to read format with recipes, stories, lots to keep you busy. I also told you about the Curezone site, which is harder to wade through and there is also the Master Cleanse site if you just want to try the cleanse for yourself.

My cousin just told me about something called Asea which sounds interesting. Anyone out there have any more information about this product? One of my older sisters also told me about Isogenix cleansing and fat burning system. There is a lot of new science out there about the human body. Of course my battle is that after buying groceries and paying bills I don't have a lot of extra money for new products. So for me, I'm searching for the lifestyle changes that I can incorporate into my daily life that won't require me to get a new job to pay for them.

We are on the home stretch. I would like to do a liver flush after the 10 days and I am in the process of deciding which one to do. I suppose some may think that I must be self-absorbed to write about this and to think anyone would care about whether or not I eat in a world where many do not eat because they cannot. When it comes to my body this is a battle that I have been fighting for years. If you look at earlier entries you can see what I looked like when I was over 100 lbs heavier and still after all that good effort I am still overweight. My belief is that I will not die overweight and there will be others who will need to know what to do when genetics, life, circumstances or simple bad habits put you in a situation where you need to grab hold of yourself and save yourself. I will succeed and as I do I want to help as many others as I can, with a prayer, a positive word, a lifestyle change or a product that has changed me too. Peace, blessings and Happy Thanksgiving weekend to the Canadians out there.

Master Cleanse 2010 - Day Six

2010-10-07T13:31:00.000-07:00

Well yesterday I finished Day Six of the Master Cleanse and I wanted to write about it but I fell asleep before I could. Now for many people that might not be a big thing but usually I am unable to get to sleep until about 2 am in the morning and I would have to take some kind of sleep aid if I wanted to sleep earlier in the evening. Last night that was not the case so maybe this is the start of something good. I just wish I knew what it was that I cleaned out of my system to make that happen.

One really great thing about doing a cleanse is that you have so much more free time to do productive things. This week I have been reading, writing, composing music and making plans for the next 90 days. I always like to use the last quarter of the year to assess where I am and to try to get rid of things that I do not want to take into the new year. I used to feel so bad during the last week of the year thinking about New Year's resolutions that did not come to pass and promises that were broken. For the last two years I switched it up and by doing an assessment now, I can make sure that December 31 is a final day of Thanksgiving for the year.

I've been reading the Curezone.com website about the Master Cleanse and many people on the site recommend a Liver Flush after completing the cleanse. I am going to have to read more about it for the next few days and I will let you know if I do one. I am finding that my physical cravings for different foods have faded and now it is just the visual or sensory carvings that one feels when you see or smell different foods. I'm staying away from the Food Network and the Cooking Channel this week.

Peace and Blessings...

Master Cleanse 2010 - Day Five

2010-10-05T18:26:00.000-07:00

Some people have asked me, "how can you go 5 days without eating? Don't you get bored?" Boredom could be an issue on this cleanse if you let it, because the stimulus of food is everywhere, on billboards, buses, TVs, magazines, online, so there are distractions everywhere. And let's not talk about how wonderful food can smell at times. Your sense of smell during a cleanse becomes so heightened and it can be overwhelming. This is why I decided not to accept any friend's invitations to socialize while on the fast.

I also wanted to post more info about the Grade B Maple syrup and the cayenne pepper, why do we use them as ingredients?

Grade B Maple Syrup
-Contains manganese, an antioxidant mineral which helps neutralize free-radicals. Just 2 teaspoons equals 22% of your daily value
- Provides energy with its high levels of B vitamins and amino acids (amino acids are the
building blocks of protein).
- It also contains zinc, which helps maintain a healthy immune system. Zinc is required by
hundreds of enzymes in your body for normal functioning.

Cayenne Pepper
- As the best blood circulation stimulant known, capsaicin (its active ingredient) stops
platelets from clumping together and therefore allows blood to flow more easily.
- It soothes the digestive tract and stimulates the flow of stomach secretions and saliva.
- It is considered a thermogenic, which raises metabolism and aids in weight loss.
That info was from The Master Cleanse website. It is a great source of information about the cleanse and resources, books, and a community of people who have either done the cleanse or are in the process of doing it.

I'm thankful for another day completed. I am not weighing my body throughout the cleanse because I'm not doing this for weight loss, I am doing it to clean out my mind and body. After I have finished the cleanse I am going to add a vegan diet (a couple days a week) to my life. This fast has reminded me that there are foods that make your body feel well and foods that make you feel sick.

Peace and Blessings...

Master Cleanse 2010 - Day Four

2010-10-04T22:44:00.000-07:00

Today was a much better day. I'm glad I made it this far because each time I've fasted I've had people tell me, "I could never do that", or I'll support you while I make an sandwich, lol". I'm not saying that I do not find it to be a challenge but I can tell you for me and my own personal metabolism, this works. I've also heard from others who have similar stories.

The main point is that a cleanse or a fast is a highly personal experience. There are buttons inside you that others may not know about that only a fast can expose. That is why many people who are at a change point in their life, who seek direction for their 'next' have found a fast or a cleanse to be a great way to clear the mind from the task of daily foraging for food to concentrate on their inner self and the quiet voice of God within.

My favorite Bible passage is Isaiah 43 and it is one that I have claimed as my own. I place my own name in it where others are mentioned. So for me it starts like this:

Isaiah 43

1 But now, this is what the LORD says—
he who created you, Dede,
he who formed you,Dede:
"Fear not, for I have redeemed you;
I have summoned you by name; Dede, you are mine.

2 When you pass through the waters, Dede,
I will be with you;
and when you pass through the rivers,
they will not sweep over you.
When you walk through the fire,
you will not be burned;
the flames will not set you ablaze.

from the Bible Gateway

I like to meditate on a God who is with me through the task of living a purpose-filled life. I thank God for another day and I will now breathe and be thankful that I made it through another day. Thank you so much for sharing it with me.

Peace and blessings.

Master Cleanse 2010 - Day Three

2010-10-04T00:22:00.000-07:00

Today was just as awful as I thought it would be but not so bad that I had to quit. At this point in the cleanse it seems that the toxins built up in your body come out from various places and that is uncomfortable. But I also noticed my sense of smell was more acute and my memory and thought process seemed a bit better. Also, perhaps because I stabilized my vitamin supplement regiment my mood was up and my sense of humor was intact.

My dog was not as happy because there were no meals being made(with all the accompanying smells) and no food to beg for so his life has been curtailed as well. I'm looking forward to this next stage of the cleansing fast where your antenna to God is locked on full force and there is no static getting in the way of the still small voice inside you that guides you to the next step. I also thank God that I am still in charge of my flesh and when my body needs to be brought into submission, I have the discipline to start and the common sense to stop at the right time. Thank God for one more day.

Master Cleanse 2010 - Day Two

2010-10-02T21:25:00.000-07:00

Whew! I made it through Day Two. It is the end of the day and I am winding down. I did boil the distilled water with raw peeled ginger root. It added another kick start to the drink (along with the cayenne pepper) and I found it to be a refreshing drink which I enjoyed drinking. So yeah! I prepared my drink for tomorrow with both the ginger and two cups of mint tea that I made from the distilled water and fresh mint leaves. I tried it out and it tasted really good. What I don't know is the effect that will have on the cleansing process. But it does make this something I can drink for a long term. And I have 8 more days to go so that is a good thing.

Unfortunately though I feel like crap but my body is definitely responding to this break from crazy food. I've had a real craving for fried foods in the last few months so I hope this fast breaks that cycle and I can eat more a more raw, vegan diet. I still love a good steak but if I felt better I could learn to live without it. There are so many great fresh choices in Southern California so I do have options and I love to prepare different things. Right now, I'm going to sign off because this would be the time I had a late night snack with my dog and that is not happening tonight. So pray for me on Day Three which will start in just a few hours...

Master Cleanse 2010 - Day One

2010-10-01T13:23:00.000-07:00

Usually this day is not the most physically challenging, that credit usually goes to Day Three, but this day is usually the most mentally challenging. It is so easy to go "My bad, did I say cleanse, I meant to say pig out, and then proceed to eat everything in the cupboard. But I know that because I am blogging about this, then my failure will live forever on the internet and future generations will know that I lacked the commitment to do something really good for my body. And I am no punk, so here we go. I stuck to the Agave Nectar for the lemonade drink and today for some reason it tastes better and it goes down easier. I had my herbal tea this morning and I enjoyed the warmth of it as I sat thru a rare thunder and lightning storm in Los Angeles.

I think I will have to have more tea later in the day to keep warm. I'm also going to get a new book to read so I don't pass these initial days thinking about all the food I will not be eating. During one cleanse I watched the Food Network for 10 hours straight and fed and tortured myself with those visuals of everything I was trying not to eat. Instead today I will reflect on why I want to be successful with this and what the ultimate benefits will be. I remember how clear my mind was after 15 days of one successful fast and how the ideas flowed. My energy levels were up my skin looked amazing. I want that again so this is worth it and so am I.

Thankful Thought:
I am thankful for family and friends who are as close as family. I am thankful that troubled times do not last forever and after every season of pain and doubt comes a season of joy. I thank God for showing me how great the younger generations are and the new way they have of thinking and processing their world. I am thankful for who I am on this day, and I see myself as part of God's great creation. Many of you read these blogs as an email or FB note and send your comments as such, but I would appreciate if you stopped by the page to give a shout-out sometimes too. Peace and Blessings.

Prepping for Master Cleanse - Ginger Mint Julip Anyone?

2010-09-30T16:48:00.000-07:00

Master Cleanse Mixed Juice With Ginger And Mint

In reading about the Master Cleanse on www.curezone.com, I discovered that some people do prep work before going on the cleanse to prep both the body and mind. I have never done that in my earlier cleanses but since I was changing the recipe this time (substituting Agave Nectar for the Maple Syrup) I decided a little prep time might be beneficial.

I went out and bought my lemons and a few limes as well and the Agave and today I mixed my first batch according to the recipe discussed in the previous blog. I found that I needed to increase the amount of Agave by 1/4 cup, bringing the total to 1 cup for 120 oz., not 3/4 cup as initially described. It still tasted "watered down", something I did not find with the Grade B maple syrup from Dr. Stanley Burroughs' original recipe. Should I make the adjustment now and go back to the tried and true recipe that worked before?

I decided that I will make another batch with a 1/2 cup Agave Nectar and a 1/2 cup Grade B Maple Syrup to see if that makes it taste more substantial. A cousin of mine, Taryn, emailed and said she only lasted 4 days when she tried it so I told her that I would try to also add some zested ginger (using a microplane zester)and see how that affected the taste. Perhaps some crushed mint as well, what do you think? I also find that crushed parley in small amounts can add a depth of flavor without overpowering if done right. I will go back to the lab, (I mean the kitchen) and get started.

I know that if I added other fruit juices this would also give it more flavor but I don't want to change the benefits of using the lemon as the main juice source. I want to stay true to the principles and the idea of the Master Cleanse. But the occasional drop of Angostura Bitters might be a fun addition... So who is going to join me? We start tomorrow....

In Addition

I would just like to say a prayer of thanksgiving for my dog Chachi. He was in the hospital this week for two days for diabetic ketoacidosis. Imagine a small dog on IV meds including insulin and antibiotics fighting to get better. But he is a fighter and he is back home. Thanks to Dr. Heim, Dr. Tanaka and all the support staff at the Animal Medical Center of Southern California.

It’s Master Cleanse Time Again…

2010-09-29T22:06:00.001-07:00

Master Cleanse Recipe

Daily Mixture (for 120 oz of liquid a day)

1 ¼ cup of fresh squeezed lemon juice (organic if possible)

3/4 cup Agave Nectar or 1 ¼ cup Grade B Maple Syrup

Pinch of Cayenne Pepper (to taste)

Distilled Water - 115 0z.

Mixture should be made fresh daily so to keep the enzymes alive and fresh.

Also you need to have a Smooth Move Tea every morning and a gentle herbal laxative at night because the lack of fiber in your diet will make elimination a challenge.

Start with a pinch or two of cayenne and gradually increase to 1/10th teaspoon. Do NOT put cayenne pepper (capsicum) in capsules and take separate from the lemonade drink. It changes the action of the formula, and if sent directly to the stomach can cause inflammation and excessive mucous secretion. This may lead to sinusitis or to bowel mucous, and can even contribute to inflammatory bowel syndrome.

Drink 1/2 your body weight in ounces every day. (example: If you weigh 100 pounds, you should drink 50 ounces)

Agave nectar and Grade B maple syrup are two of the most balanced of all sugars, containing a balance of positive and negative ions. Neither enters the bloodstream as rapidly as honey or sugar which is better for people who react adversely to sugars, (becoming restless, sleepless, and energetic after consuming sugar), or may be borderline or pre-diabetic. Diabetics should definitely substitute agave for the maple syrup, using up to 1/4 tablespoon.

For the deepest cleanse, it is recommended that you cleanse for at least two weeks. Exercise enhances the cleansing action of the program.

During the middle and later phases of the cleanse, the body chemistry changes, and energy levels may begin to increase. One may experience minor discomforts, such as headaches, upset stomach, or low energy, as toxins and parasites are released from the body. These symptoms will be short-lived.

It is important that you have a positive attitude during cleansing or fasting. If you are unaccustomed to the process, you can prepare yourself by fasting one day a week. The biggest obstacle to successful cleansing is fear of failure and not knowing what to expect.

To fast for 24 hours, it is easiest if you begin at noon and finish at noon on the following day or from one dinner to the next.

Again, drink plenty of water.

As you begin a fast, you may experience some unpleasant side effects of cleansing, such as headache, nausea, bloating, or irritability. These symptoms are part of the cleansing response and are often a result of toxins and waste matter being purged from the body, which usually takes place within 12 to 36 hours.

If you experience these symptoms, you can cut back on your fluid intake, and turn to vegetable juices; carrot juice, and 50/50 mixes carrot and celery, spinach and broccoli is really good. Carrot with a little apple juice or carrot, apple, and a little lemon juice is good to facilitate the continuation of the cleansing. Six ounces of carrot juice, one ounce of apple, and 1/2 ounce of lemon juice will help keep the pH steady, slow the diarrhea, and keep the cleansing action going.

If you are feeling nauseated and bloated, it is an indication of two possibilities: 1. poisons are being released at a very rapid rate and may be backing up into the liver. Keeping the lever cleansed and flushed is extremely important. So it would be good to take ledum essential oil in a capsule at night or early morning. Ledum has a very strong effect on the liver and kidneys as a diuretic and a bile duct dilator. (be sure the ledum essential oil is a therapeutic-grade, approved for internal use)

Additional information about the Master Cleanse is taken from http://curezone.com/

New Recipe - New Orleans Muffaletta Omelette Breakfast

2010-07-25T13:18:00.000-07:00

I was in Canada visiting family during the month of July. I was privileged to see my niece have her first baby, a beautiful daughter named Willow and of course to spend much needed time with both of my parents. During the trip I stayed at one of my sister's homes and call it jet-lag, climate change or just life, wouldn't you know it I caught a bad cold on my last day in Canada. And by the time my plane landed in LA, I was a hacking, sneezing, coughing mess. And trust me, I did not feel like cooking.

Three days later, I was feeling a bit stronger and decided to make myself a special breakfast. Because I had been traveling I had not bought any groceries for two weeks and had to see what I could put together from the fridge contents and the presents I had received from Canada.
Inside the fridge I found eggs, serrano peppers, garlic, apple-wood bacon, and goat cheese. I also had a bottle of pickled gardenia mix (canned cauliflower, red peppers, and carrots) that my niece had canned this year and some onion stuffed olives from Olive-It International (www.olivelovers.com ).

I fried up the bacon first, and the apple-wood smoked hickory aroma immediately woke up my dog who became attached to my leg while I was cooking. I laid the bacon strips out to drain the oil off them and diced the gardenia mix, garlic, peppers, and olives.
After adding the bacon strips to the mixture I realized that it reminded me of a sandwich I had in New Orleans called a muffaletta. It originated in the French Quarter and it is made with good crusty bread and an olive salad. The rest of it is ham and cheese with some salami and pepperoni tossed in. I decided to make a Muffaletta Omelette or at least my version of one.

I quickly mixed up my egg mixture (2 eggs, 2 tablespoon of milk, a pinch of black pepper, and sweet basil). I did not add any salt because my muffaletta mix had salt from the bacon, gardenia mix and the olives. I placed my pan on medium heat with a light coating of olive oil. When it warmed I poured my egg mixture into the pan. As it started to set I poured my muffaletta mixture into the middle third of the pan, added the goat cheese and folded the omelette over it. As the egg mixture cooked I kept folding it over until I lifted it out of the pan. I placed it on my plate and garnished with the remaining olive mixture and goat cheese.

I then took a large croissant, slice it open, decorated it with romaine lettuce and put my Muffaleta Omelette on top and served it sandwich style.

The smoky hickory taste of the bacon, the delicate creamy goat cheese and the salty brine of the olive gardenia mix was heavenly. The garlic and the sweet basil layers were noted but not overpowering. I would definitely make this for a Sunday brunch with guests. You should try it out and let me know how you like it. My word of caution again would be to not add any salt to your egg mixture before cooking - the muffaletta mix will have all the salt you need. And if you feel compassionate, give a tiny piece of bacon to the dog...

Muffaletta Omelette

Ingredients:

* 2 eggs
* 2 Tbsp. whole milk
* 1 serrano pepper (you can substitute with ¼ cup green pepper if you don’t like the heat or remove the seeds for less heat)
* 2 strips of apple wood bacon crisply fried
* 2 oz goat cheese
* ¼ cup gardenia mix (mine was canned by my niece but you can substitute with Bick’s® Hot Mixed Pickles (http://www.bicks.ca/en/products_sub.aspx?pid=92)
* 4 garlic stuffed olives, chopped ( I used Olive-It ‘s Garlic Stuffed Olives, http://www.olivelovers.ca/products/stuffed-olives/garlic )
* ¼ teaspoon sweet basil, dried not fresh
* Salt and ground black pepper, to taste
* 2 Tbsp clarified butter or whole butter

Preparation:

1. Fry up the bacon first, lay the bacon strips out to drain the oil off them and crumple them up in a bowl.

2. To create the muffaletta mix, chop the gardenia mix, serrano pepper, and garlic stuffed olives and add them to the bacon and mix them together.

3. In another bowl, mix up the egg mixture with your dried spices (the 2 eggs, 2 tablespoon of milk, a pinch of black pepper, and sweet basil). I did not add any salt to mine because my muffaletta mix had salt from the bacon, gardenia mix and the olives.

4. Heat a heavy-bottomed nonstick sauté pan over medium-low heat. Add the butter and let it melt.

5. When the butter in the pan is hot enough to make a drop of water hiss, pour in the eggs. Let the eggs cook for up to a minute or until the bottom starts to set.

6. With a heat-resistant rubber spatula, gently push one edge of the egg into the center of the pan, while tilting the pan to allow the still liquid egg to flow in underneath.

7. Pour the muffaletta mixture into the middle third of the pan, add the goat cheese and fold the omelette over it.

8. As the egg mixture cooks keep folding it over until it is ready to be lifted it out of the pan.

9. Gently transfer the finished omelette to a plate. Garnish with the remainder of the chopped muffaletta mix and goat cheese if desired.

10. Take a large croissant, slice it open, decorate it with romaine lettuce and put the Muffaletta Omelette on top and serve it sandwich style immediately.

Dede Blunt (The Blunt Instrument)

A Bump in the Road ...

2009-07-01T10:06:00.000-07:00

Let me state off the top that is is not an attempt to solicit funds but it is a response to the inquiries of many of my family and friends as to an update on my Disney Half-Marathon Journey.

After running 7 miles during my 8th week of training for the Disney Half-Marathon I felt so exhausted that I just wanted to cry. And after 3 days my body still was not recovering from the run so I made a doctor's appointment.
Test results showed that I was suffering from anemia again and those that know me know what that particular battle entails - I won't put that out here on the net because it is a battle I intend to win and I will not give my enemy (anemia) any glory or place in my life. Friends who know how to pray and want the details can call me and get the 411.

My doctor (who is a marathoner - how cool is that?) also said that I needed to see a podiatrist and a cardiologist in addition to my hematologist to address the other physical issues that came up. The great thing about it was none of these physicians said, "Doreen you should not be doing this, you need to stop." Instead everyone came back with a plan to address the physical issues and get me to the finish line. One thing that I had to do was to stop running. But everyone said "But keep walking for now until we can get you back running." To the athletes out there, that might not be a big thing but you need to understand.
Most of my adult life I have been a "big girl" who you might see in the kitchen whipping up gourmet meals but you would not see her in the gym or on a track or in a park. And now, these health professionals were treating me as an athlete with injuries related to her training and like all other athletes we were just going to deal with them and move forward.

Three and a half years ago doctors were telling me if you don't change you will die. You can't climb stairs and you can't run. So in the midst of the disappointment comes the realization that my body may not completely reflect this yet but I have changed (and continued to maintain a 100 lb. weight loss) and I can be proud of myself and own this and see that yes, I have made the choice to live and not die and my body is still going through the process of change along with my mind. Both need time to adjust. But I thank God that I am still here.

My challenge now however that the commitment of the APLA Disney Half-Marathon is two-fold. You have to be able to keep a 16 minute mile pace and you have to raise $2000.00.
And even though the race is not until September 6 you have to have (through pledges and donations) the money raised by July 10. On July 27, if the funds are not raised, you have to guarantee your commitment to raise them by your credit card. And for my family with both David and I racing this would be a substantial commitment for our household. As a fundraiser I know how to raise money and I also have faith in our world and know that if you commit to a God-given vision then provision will follow. But physically, I am using all of my current energy just to keep moving and continuing to train. I literally have to nap every afternoon right now to get through the day.

I had a "Come to Jesus" meeting with my husband last Friday where he was quite frank with me about the financial needs of our household and we both decided that we could put our time, resources and energy to completing this marathon or we could put them to fully meeting our fundraising commitment but we could not do both successfully. And while my plan is to add other forms of exercise such as yoga and pilates to keep my body healthy and agile, I have a commitment to run a half-marathon that I will not back down off of.

There are other Half-marathons being run in southern California before the end of the year without the fundraising constraints of the Disney marathon. David and I will complete a half-marathon before the end of 2009. I am not stopping my training and we have decided to move forward. As the very wise Dr. Charles Phillips once told me, "Every delay is not a denial"

So keep us in your prayers. I will keep you posted as we do our due diligence with the APLA Disney Marathon team. And before I sign off I just want to say a big thank you to my marathon running coach for the Disney Half-Marathon, Biff Campos. First of all, when I discussed my exercise background with him, he never flinched and said, "If you stick with me and stick with the plan you can absolutely do this thing". So I thank him for believing in me before I could believe in myself. And now I also know I can absolutely do this thing. And a big shout out to Linda L. Francisco for her fundraising training and sharing her heart, expertise and her commitment to her runners.

Thanks for taking the time to read about my journey. Thank you to all who have already given me their money or time or prayers as I've gone on this journey - I will honor your sacrifice and I will keep in touch as I complete this commitment.

Back to Business

2008-11-09T17:11:00.000-08:00

Okay, it has been too long since I last wrote but I have been really busy. David changed jobs and started working in Glendale CA (a suburb of Los Angeles), and after one week of commuting two hours from Bakersfield, he knew that he would not be doing it for long.

So in the span of two months we made the decision to rent out our home in Bakersfield and to move to Glendale so he could be closer to work. So we staged the Bakersfield home, and within two weeks we found a family to rent the house.

I am thankful because some people have found it difficult to find good tenants in this economy but we have been blessed.

So now we are in Glendale. David is working at Glendale Adventist Medical Center and we are living in a house that is just behind the hospital and a Seventh Day Adventist Church. The neighborhood is tree lined (it looks like there is an orange tree and a lime tree in our backyard - which is funny because I always wanted to plant a lime tree at our Bakersfield home). We are secluded off the main street with a tree lined pathway to the house. The house is older but we are enjoying the neighborhood - lots of nice restaurants, shopping centers and close to everything. Here are some pictures of our new home. And the Whole Foods Store that is close to home...

Most importantly it is good to be closer to the production world here in LA. I'd still like to have a full time editing job so I believe that will be easier to do here in Los Angeles. The house here is close to downtown and after I get the boxes unpacked I will go and see what is out there. I do believe that the best is yet to come.
So, after staying her for a year, (the house we are in belongs to the hospital and they have offered to let us stay here for a year to get a feel for the area in order to find our new home.) It is a great opportunity because we are getting to see all of the suburbs and downtown areas and I can make a better informed choice about where to buy.

I miss my family and friends back home but I feel a new excitement about the move. It is funny because the economy is in a recession, the unemployment rate is up and the markets are wildly fluctuating but I feel like things are getting better every day. Maybe change really has come to America. But I know God still is in charge of my life and I choose to trust in his will. I will say good bye for now and try to do better about keeping you informed about what is going on with us. David, Chachi, and I are doing fine.

Why Hillary Should Be Respected

2008-06-04T13:50:00.000-07:00

Today the American people celebrate the end of a primary season that resulted in the awakening of the people to the power of the vote. More people have voted in this primary than ever before in history and we have seen tv ratings for debates that rival the top TV programs and stadiums filled with 18-75 thousand people, wanting to see the candidate for the next president of the USA. And the democratic party has added thousands of new potential voters to the rolls that could show up in November and literally take over the political landscape. That is phenomenal to see.

It was interesting to me that after Obama had racked up 11 victories in the race and the number of delegates appeared to be in his favor a new phenomenon appeared. Women started to vote for Clinton en mass to register a vote for the future, for their daughters, to say that when we had the chance to vote for a qualified woman, we raised our collective voice and did so. But they only came out and did that AFTER it was mathematically impossible for her to win. Her wins in South Dakota and West Virginia were the voices of women comfortable to vote for symbolism without having to worry about that vote damaging their chances of winning in the fall. The powers that be wanted a new voice and a change in the political landscape that Barack Obama currently represents.

My hope is that the Democratic party starts to heal soon and the race is between two individuals who are passionate about their view of the way the country should be run and who engage in telling the American people why they believe they should prevail. My prayer is that it is about the issues and not personality, but I am not naive enough to think that partisan politics will not make an appearance in this race. And I hope that Hillary Clinton answers the question as to what she does want in the future and that the party finds a way to move forward and meet those needs. America does need a saviour at this time in history because the story of its greatness could go either way at this crossroads. Let's hope that we elect a team of people who have its best interests at heart. God bless America.

Master Cleanse - Day 12

2008-03-21T09:32:00.000-07:00

Can this really be Day 12? I don't believe it myself but it is true. Do I want to quit? Yes I do. To be planning a weekend that included breaking this fast (slowly, starting with orange juice the first day and adding a homemade vegetable soup the next day)would be awesome. But I did not start out to do a 12 Day fast. In my mind I saw myself doing three weeks and at least doing the 10 days as prescribed by Dr. Stanley Burroughs in his book, The Master Cleanser.

And can I just be myself for a minute here? You should not be doing this fast if you could not spend $7.00 to buy Dr. Burroughs book. It is not a long book by today's standards but he breaks everything down very clearly and tells you the whys and hows of what it is and why it works. Everything else you read on the web is other people's opinions and interpretations of what was his life's work. You can purchase it on Amazon.com - use the title as a keyword.

Okay, enough of my rant. Peter Glickman has also written about the diet in his book Lose Weight, Have More Energy & Be Happier in 10 Days but I have not read his book. Other people have said good things about it. And I don't want anyone to read this journal about my time doing this fast and to think, well, this is a great and easy diet - actually it is not. It is not easy to only drink the lemonade for 10 or more days at a time. Our world is not structured that way. Everywhere I drive I see food establishments, and grocery stores - and can we talk about the street vendors with the amazing aromas coming from their carts and vehicles? You have to be doing this for a reason and if it is for more than just the desire to lose a couple of pounds then you can do it and make it to the end.

I had many reasons for doing this fast. I have recently opened my own business after years of pouring my work and efforts into helping other businesses succeed. Last year I spent many days in poor health. Recently I saw my weight start to creep up and in the span of four months I had gained ten pounds. I knew this was because of the cold weather and my lack of motivation to go outside and walk in the cold but it was still a warning sign. And my thought process as a creative and visionary individual was more jumbled and had lost a sense of clarity. So I knew that now was a time to regain my sense of self, including the energy, drive and my love of life. So I needed this break or fast. Fortunately for me, my husband also felt a need in his life to do the same and we are flowing together and in sync.

So that is what I am here, writing about this journey. The aches and pains are gone and my sinuses have stopped clogging up and giving me headaches. Today feels like just another day but I am grateful to be alive, thankful to be in this moment and I expect great things in my future. Now I'm going to have another glass and then get to work...

The Master Cleanse - Day 11

2008-03-20T12:55:00.000-07:00

Wow, I am amazed and thankful that I made it to this day. Especially since I am now in the process of cooking an amazing curried chicken dinner to take to a friend. (Yes, I am sipping lemonade and filling my kitchen with the great smells of onion, garlic, turmeric, cinnamon, curry powder, nutmeg, soya sauce and more.) Yes, the scents are enough to drive one crazy. But I'm doing it to give to a really good person so it is worth it.

I've lost 10 lbs during this fast but I gained a new peace and calm that I did not have before and I also have gained a new confidence in myself and in my own self control. It is nice to reaffirm that nothing controls me but my love for my God and my family. For me personally, that is a good thing to know inside my spirit.

Ok, it is 1:45 pm and I have just finished the first part of my meal. I grilled the chicken on my stove top but it released so much fat onto the grill that they almost had a fried texture instead of a grilled one but the skin was crisp and brown and they smelled great. I chopped up 4 Roma tomatoes, one small onion and a half cup of mushrooms and I sauted them with garlic. Then I added 1/2 a can of Campbell's Mushroom soup, 1/2 cup of sour cream and a cup of soy milk (I'm trying to use things in the fridge that will definitely go bad before I finish this fast). I added a 1/4 teaspoon of cinnamon, a sprig of thyme and a teaspoon of the masala curry powder. This is a Trinidadian curry not an Indian curry so it is a different spice mix than you might be used to. But the creamy spicy mixture was poured all over the chicken and then I covered it all and placed it in the oven to meld the tastes together. My dog is wondering where his portion is. Wait til he hears that it is all leaving the house...

I'm looking at the cupboards to see what else I should cook now that I have the chance to get this food out of the house. I have some red and white potatoes left so I think I will chop them into rustic chunks and let them marinate in a lemon juice, olive oil, garlic, smoked salt, chopped cilantro and fresh thyme vinaigrette for an hour and then I'll roast them in the oven when I take the chicken out. That will get rid of them all in a tasty manner. Then I'll sit down with another glass of my delicious Lemonade...

The potatoes are crispy on the outside and tender on the inside. At least that is how they look - I can't taste even one. I did put a little of the marinade on my tongue to make sure the seasoning was good and it was. I added some Basmati Rice (cooked with the other half of the can of Campbell's Cream of Mushroom soup and some Red Kidney Beans, with steamed mixed vegetables with Lemon Butter as the last side.

I've packed it all up and it is ready to go. Now I'm going to have another glass of my lemonade. That is it for today. I feel good but I do wish I was tearing into one serving of this dinner, lol...

Master Cleanse - Day 9

2008-03-18T10:47:00.000-07:00

Hello all. Day nine and going strong but I am a little discouraged about nine days and only nine pounds off - am I being a little unreasonable? I guess because I'm exercising along with my fast (yes, I do have the energy to do an hour of exercise), so I think I should see more. Oh well, getting discouraged does not solve problems and quiting before an assignment is finished is not a behavior pattern that I wish to develop. So I'm going to check the message boards to see if I can find some encouraging news there.
I'll be right back...

12:00 noon - My sinus problem is getting worse and it is very annoying. I'm toughing it out tho. There were many encouraging messages on the boards but surprisingly enough I found alot more messages of failure so I decided to quit while I was ahead

Master Cleanser Detox Fast - Day 8

2008-03-17T11:28:00.000-07:00

For some reason today my sinuses are blocked and congested and it feels like I'm in an airplane that is descending rapidly or I'm coming down the Mountains in my car. Ugh! I hate this feeling. I feel tired and sluggish but I know this means my system is finally getting rid of the toxins. I increased my cayenne pepper intake yesterday too so maybe that plays a part here.

I'm thankful that my schedule is light today and I can catch up on my reading and read some editing manuals to keep my knowledge base current. The lemonade is refreshing today and in my break from writing I took a sinus pill and I can feel the pressure in my sinuses easing up.

Chachi the California dog is not very active today. He is getting older (he is 12)and he loves to sleep and eat treats. He does not like to go for long walks or to share confidences. he prefers to be left alone, unless you wanted to brush his coat for an hour. He is a handsome boy though...

Master Cleanser Day 7 Evaluation

2008-03-16T19:15:00.000-07:00

It is Sunday evening and I've have been fasting now for seven days. This is my third time doing the Master Cleanse and it has been a good learning experience. I am not experiencing alot of hunger as long as I continue to drink my lemonade at regular intervals. But cooking is an activity that soothes me and relaxes me so I have really missed the act of cooking for myself and others. I don't even necessarily want to eat what I cook, but I do love the sights, the sounds and the smells of food. I have found though that I do not want to be around people who are eating for long periods of time - nor do I want to smell the cooked food of others. There is an internal message in there somewhere that I need to tap into but I don't know what it is yet.

I am glad that I will start week two tomorrow and I don't know what the day will hold. My husband has said that he could do three weeks but next weekend is a large celebration for us as it is Resurrection Sunday for our faith. Part of the celebration normally included food, with different varieties and types. Can we celebrate our God quietly with meditation and introspection instead? I know that most of my friends are not even trying to answer that question on that day. But this is a good time to hear that inner voice and I will be listening, as we go forward with week two. Thanks for sticking with me...

Another Day in Bakersfield CA

2008-03-15T15:48:00.000-07:00

Well it is day 6 of my fast and I wish I could say it is getting easier. I hope that it does really soon. I went shopping with my husband for our groceries (consisting of lemons, limes and maple syrup). Shopping in the grocery store is hard. Especially the scent of the barbecued chicken vendors outside of the grocery store (My Lord God). I thank God for my spouse - he is hanging tough and supporting me all the way. So we are committed to at least 1 more week. So I will keep you posted.

I got a chance to read a blog posting from one of my nephews in Canada and it made me feel good to know that one of the things that I love, the power of the written word and the ability to communicate is also alive in the next generation. It is nice to think that if I do not get this thing called life right that perhaps the generation following me will do a better job. My only goal is to leave them more money when I'm gone than generations before. I dream about the day when we do not have to struggle and choose between our passion and our paycheck (American spelling - I do live in the USA).

Think I will take a quick nap.

Thank God It's Friday...

2008-03-14T11:01:00.001-07:00

Well here it is Friday and I'm getting through Day 5. Yesterday was tough because I wanted to eat - not because I was hungry but because I was bored. And watching 2 Throwdowns with Bobby Flay on the Food Network was probably not a good idea. But the jerk rib eye steak challenge and the barbecue rib challenge were difficult to resist - both are foods that I would like to take up a notch in my cooking. I ended up going to bed at 10 pm which is early for me but I knew that if I stayed up later I might not resist temptation. So I went to sleep and another day was done.

Note to self - might be a good time to stop Tivoing the Food Network...

Today I added some lime zest to my drink. Only do that if you are using the organic lemons and limes like Dr. Burroughs insists on in his book. Otherwise you could be zesting chemicals and pesticides into your system. It tasted great and was a real treat to drink.

I still don't like going to the grocery store to buy more lemons, water and maple syrup. The grocery stores these days have sandwiches, fried chicken, potato wedges, pizza and more to tempt shoppers, and tho I am not hungry per se I am still aware of the smells, even more so now that my system is starting to be cleansed and my senses are heightened.

I have lost a couple of lbs to date but I am not focusing on that. My muscles feel good and my clothes aren't tight, I have more energy and work is easy. I'm also meditating on my personal self improvement, getting rid of things that keep me from functioning at my peak.

And by the way, the husband is doing great this week on the Cleanse. I don't think he'd want me to describe it for posterity's sake so I will leave him out of this.
But I will post pictures when we are done.

I Made It to Day 3 - Master Cleanse

2008-03-12T16:07:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was interesting because I was making dinner for 6 and doing a detoxification fast. I did not know if I could make it - making dinner to serve others and not indulging myself. But I did it. I did not feel like eating because of hunger, you really don't feel hungry on this fast - it was more the sensation of eating and the sights and smells of the food. But my mind was made up that I was doing this to better myself and to become more in tune with my spiritual and mental self. So after everyone was gone I made up my lemonade drink for the next morning and went to bed. I was tired but restless and it took a while to get to sleep.

So today was definitely a quieter day and I was not hungry per se but I did have stomach pangs which were usually a signal for me to snack or nibble on something. I also felt really cold today right in my bones and my muscles especially my leg muscles were achy. But I don't feel like these are signs that I should discontinue the fast, I'm going to keep going and see what happens. Because I've already done it successfully in the past, I know that these feelings will soon be gone. I'm thankful that I've been able to get through this day.

Cooking for Others, Lemonade for Me...

2008-03-11T13:03:00.000-07:00

Today will be an interesting day because I am doing what I would not recommend ANYONE do while doing the Master Cleanser plan - I am hosting a dance rehearsal (with dinner served) at my house while only on Day Two of the Master Cleanser plan. And what a dinner I am serving! I got the recipe from the Food Network website and it is for Grilled Meat and Vegetables over Saffron Orzo (but I am substituting saffron rice). The marinade alone, a mixture of EVOO, lemon juice, 5 cloves of garlic, smoked sea salt, black and red pepper would normally be enough to send me off the deep end, but by the time you combine it with the roasted corn, crimini mushrooms, grilled red,yellow and green peppers and the grilled shrimp over the rice - well you get the idea, not really something you would want to do on the second day of your fast.

So why then am I doing it? Well that is a long story but I really did want to bless the other women involved with our dance ministry and I truly believe that mentally I'm in a space where I can do this because I am not trying to lose weight right now, I am trying to get more in tune with me, mentally, physically and spiritually. And part of that journey for me involves serving others and self sacrifice. So my meat is marinating and I about about to start chopping vegetables and get the barbecue ready.

I believe that good things will happen today but I will keep you posted. this is one for the record books.

The Master Cleanser Journal

2008-03-11T12:54:00.000-07:00

Day One

I decided to try the Master Cleanser detoxification program to help bring my body back to a feeling of health and energy. I did the "diet" a few years ago and after 14 days I felt renewed and mentally sharp in a way that could not be duplicated by other means.

My husband also decided to join me on this journey and so we are doing it together. Day 1 was yesterday and I went through the physical pains of not eating but mentally I decided to tough it out. At one point (around 2 pm) I took a nap for 2 hours so I would not have to listen to my stomach cry for food. By the time 6 pm rolled around I was calmer and more relaxed and the night time wasn't a time of testing for me but I did have a hard time getting to sleep.

I did not do much meditating or reading on this first day - I think I just needed to see if I was serious about doing this or if I was going to punk out and say - "my bad, just kidding, I didn't mean it". But thank God, I made it through the first day and things are okay. I had my Smooth Move tea before bed and sleep finally came.

Some Thoughts for 2007

2007-12-13T13:41:00.000-08:00

First of all I can't believe that it is December already and that my tree is decorated, the houselights are up and Christmas is almost here. I'm glad I made it because with two major surgeries, some days I wondered if I would ever be strong again. But I did make it, thank God.

Well, I've finished one year of living in Bakersfield,CA and I have to say that I do like it. It is pretty cold right now, between 55-58F and my pool looks inviting but is actually ice cold. Some days tho, I wish I could just jump in, but I will have to wait for at least 5 more months. Next summer I'm going in every day.

It has been nice to get back to work and to do a few projects to complete the year. It makes me think that I can have a productive life again and still create something special. But of course, the biggest project that I have for 2008 is the birth of the Blunt baby (or babies). I know that that day is coming soon and it is scary and exciting all at the same time. I know I have enough love inside me to give to my baby and my husband is so terrific and will be a great dad. I just can't see or imagine what my life will be with children, how my day will go and the sacrifices and changes that are coming my way. I guess that is all part of the adventure tho, right?

I am just happy to be alive, happy that Christmas is still an exciting and magical time for me. I watched White Christmas last night with Danny Kaye and Bing Crosby. It reminds me of Christmas as a child growing up in Canada but last night it also struck me as to how "white" America really was. I mean back then, to be Caucasian was to be cool, to have it made, if you judged society by the movies of the time. At least the ones I watched with my family. I wonder what a white Christmas will be like for my California kids?

More thoughts to come later...

Thankful For Life...

2007-01-21T13:02:00.000-08:00

Recently I went to the doctor for routine tests. I was feeling tired and "dragged out" and "just not right" and I knew it was time to find out why. (Actually, it was my husband who was tired of me dragging myself around the house who made the Dr's appointment). A week went by and I still had no response from the doctor's office even though I called them three times to find out what the test results were. I'll talk about that more another time...

The doctor called me and told me that my life was in danger and I needed to immediately go to the hospital to be admitted. How strange life can be that one day you are planning on what you will do next and a simple phone call can change your plans instantly. I called my husband, (who was concerned but not totally surprised I imagine), and he drove me to the hospital. I was treated and released after a couple days and now I'm trying to do better where my health is concerned.

With people talking about 60 being the new 40 and 40 being the new 25 (at least that is what my girlfriends are saying), sometimes we think we can live forever. We exercise more than our moms did, take the right vitamins, use facial creams and look and feel younger. But reality is that we have a finite time on this earth and only so many days to either waste our lives or to make them count. I am working on getting my strength back again but very soon I will be working more on my legacy to the planet. And very soon the patter of little feet. I am thankful for my family and friends and I thank God for life and breath. I am also thankful for a husband who cares about me and knows me better than I know myself sometimes. David, you are my hero. Thanks for taking care of me.

A Bientot,

d.

The Bitter and the Sweet - Dreamgirls Review

2006-12-16T02:40:00.000-08:00

Today (December 15th, 2006)was a great day and a sad day for me. It started with a trip down to Los Angeles to see a preview screening of Dreamgirls - can I just say Wow, and I'll say that backwards as well, "Wow!"
First off - Eddie Murphy as James Thunder Early was dynamite - I was mesmerised and captivated from the minute he appeared on the screen. He's back, ya'all! If he doesn't get an Oscar nom then he will have been robbed, he is THAT good.
Jennifer Hudson is breathtakingly Oscar worthy as Effie. I cannot believe that Hudson came into this film as a novice - she more than holds her own with the likes of Jamie Foxx, Danny Glover, Eddie Murphy and Beyonce and simply tears up the screen. You WILL go to see her performance more than once - she is just that good.

She also is a testament to the brilliant directing of Bill Condon (who kindly signed my numbered Dreamgirls lithograph before the lights dimmed). Really - how could the HFPA have snubbed him for a Golden Globe nomination? This girl did not come off the street as a brilliant actress - somebody had to play a part in getting that performance out of her. He stood behind me watching as we, the first paying audience to see Dreamgirls took it all in. This was a little distracting for me at first but as the story unfolded I assure you, you will be as captivated as I was.
I was surprised by the lackluster performance by Jamie Foxx - he was supposed to be the villain in the story and I expected him to be more menacing and "black godfatherish" in his role but he fades to the background in scenes with Hudson and Murphy. I was suprised by this but it is true.
It was nice to see the original Lorell Robinson, Loretta Devine as a Jazz Singer toward the end of the movie, proving that she is still an original Dream girl. All I can say is please go see this movie - the performances are legendary and deserve to be seen and savored. The cinematographer Toby Schliessler and theatrical lighting designers Jules Fisher & Peggy Eisenhauer made the visuals on the screen look like a work of art. The costumes are true to the period and beautiful. I was not familiar with the work of Eddie nominated Avid editor Virginia Katz, but I will do a follow up interview with her soon - she is a talent to watch. Let me know what you think about the movie, add your comments below.

The sad note to this story was that after we saw this movie, we heard that a close family member had passed away and that I will be travelling again as a result. Life is fleeting my friends so give your flowers to the living while you can. I love you all and wish I could be with you in person.
A bientot,

doreen

Bring Your Best Dish...

2006-11-17T14:16:00.000-08:00

A friend of mine invited me for Thanksgiving dinner and I offered to bring a dish. I asked her what her preference was - meat/fish entree, dessert, or sides and she said - "I always tell people, bring your best dish." Now there was a dilemma, what is my "best dish?" First of all, you all know I LOVE to cook and since I've been on my weight loss journey I love to cook for others all the things I can't eat myself. But what would I choose as the best representation of Doreen and her love of food? I have to admit this has caused me to pause and think. I love to cook with shrimp, - bite size, delicate succulent pieces of meat drenched in coconut milk, marsala curry, garlic, onions, nutmeg and thyme served with a coconut basmati rice. Yummy! But I know there will be vegans at the dinner - perhaps I should do my eggplant with garlic/tomato wild rice stuffing covered with a parmigiana/asiago cheese topping? Or dainty vanilla cinnamon shortbread cookies (it is impossible to eat just one, they are soooo buttery and melt in your mouth good!)

Well, as you can see, I have alot of thinking to do now. Because, I love my friends and my mission with every bite of food that I prepare is to make the guests feel the love in each bite of the dish. I always want to make food that is so good the body almost feels healed just by ingesting each bite. I know this is a tall order but it is my desire. As individuals we can only touch so many people before we check out of the planet. But I do have many sensual memories of things I've seen, touched, smelled and eaten - memories that last for years. My mom's west indian fish dinners, the Welland canal with seagulls circling and boats docking, my dad's homemade pepper sauce, kettle popcorn at the Exhibition, mom's oven roasted potatoes, (to this day mine are not quite as good). I remember these scents and aromas like it was yesterday and they comfort me today as they did when I was growing up.

I want this Thanksgiving offering to be good, so I will have to think about this some more. I will keep you posted.

d.

The Thanksgiving weekend begins

2006-11-17T11:37:00.000-08:00

The holidays have come so quickly this year, in fact the whole year has whipped on by. Moving from Washington DC to Bakersfield CA has been an Alice in Wonderland adventure. To go from working constantly and 16 hour days to the slower pace of a stay at home homemaker is a real mindblower.
I'm getting used to the fact that I now have a new world to explore and a new direction to seek. First the selfish phase kicked in where I just slept, ate , swam in the pool, exercised and thought about doing good for me. That officially lasted 3 months and now I'm anxious to get back to work.
So I'm launching this blog to force myself to write every day or at least every week. I will include some general family updates, fun facts and my take on the everyday. So welcome to The Blunt Instrument. I'm hoping it evolves into a conversation and a dialogue between friends.

salut,
d.